Storytime With Spencer!
by mirage888
Summary: Spencer volunteers at the local library and tells the kids their favorite story. In it, Princess Sam and Prince Freddie go on an adventure they'll never forget! SEDDIE! And Cibby. AU because it's a fairy tale, people.
1. Library

_(A/N: Hey party people! I know that there are a bunch of fairytale stories out there, but I had an undeniable craving to make my own. So, if any part of my story sounds like something that's already out there, I apologize ahead of time! No plagiarism intended at any point. I don't know how long this story will be OR how often I'll update, but I love anyone who gives this story a chance. Keep on keepin' on!)_

**Disclaimer: iCarly at any time own I do not for; money I pay wish it for I could can't but I know. (I do not own iCarly at any time; I wish I could pay money for it but I know I can't.)**

_July 18th, 2020: Seattle Community Library_

"What story are you telling today, Mr. Spencer? What is it? Oh please, please, PLEASE tell that one about Princess Sam again!" A small girl with strawberry blonde pigtails hopped up and down from foot to foot, giving the man before her the best pouty face she could muster.

The man, who looked to be in his mid-thirties but still had an enviable head of hair, chuckled. "I don't know, Lulu. What do the rest of you guys think?" he addressed the crowd of kids before him.

The twenty-odd children all began chattering at once. "We heard that two weeks ago!" "I LOVE that story!" "I like the part where-" "Me too!" "Well _I _like when-" "I've never heard it before! What is it?" This was part of the fun of being a volunteer librarian; choosing the tale to tell. The summer reading program was in full swing, and even the most rambunctious kids seemed to enjoy storytime with Spencer.

He cleared his throat. "All right all right, everybody! If we all calm down...this IS a library...I'll tell you the story of Princess Sam." The majority of the kids cheered, while two little boys made grumbly noises. "I heard that, Nate and Noah. If you sit tight through this I'll tell a different story after- but you might be surprised. This is no ordinary princess tale. Once apon a time..."

...there was a rather unusual princess by the name of Samatha. She was unusual for several reasons: 1. She would threaten to have you beheaded if you called her Samantha, and therefore went by Sam. 2. She was actually adopted; when she was an infant, she had been left on the castle doorstep. Luckily, the king was an old softie, and raised her as his own along with her new big brother Prince Spencer and same-age sister Princess Carly. 3. She wanted no part of the typical "royal" lifestyle. You see, Princess Sam's favorite activities included feasts, naps, archery competitions, and sneaking out at night when she thought no one knew about it.

"Saaaaaaam!" called Princess Carly. "Sam, you'd better get out here fast! It's really important!" She sighed. "I"ll give you ham if you'd just get out here!" she tried once more. Suddenly, her adopted sister popped up out of seemingly nowhere.

"You said ham?" the blonde asked with her eyebrows raised in a you-better-not-be-messing-with-me sort of way.

"Yeah yeah, you can have your ham AS SOON AS you come hear what dad has to say! It's really important, I swear. Come on!" The brunette princess, the polar opposite of Sam, grabbed her sister's arm and began dragging her down the corridor. Sam knew she was strong enough to overcome the petite princess any time of any day, but she let her pretend to be stronger for a while. It seemed to make her happy.

The two girls skipped into the throne room where their father, King Shay, sat waiting for them.

"Ah, my beautiful daughters! Like night and day, you two are" said the king, winking at them. They grinned goofily back at him. As silly and old-timey as their dad was, they still loved him no matter what. "Do you have any idea why I've brought you here?" he asked. The girls shook their heads no.

"Am I too late? What's goin' on? Why the big secret meeting?" Prince Spencer's voice preceded him as he skidded into the room. He bent over double and puffed for breath, then looked expectantly at his relatives.

King Shay rolled his eyes at his son. Maybe his announcement wasn't the best idea...but he'd already made his decision, and he was going to stick to it. "Children- young adults- I've brought you here to tell you that I have decided to...retire."

Three gasps reverberated off the walls. There was a silence, and then- "Why?" "What the chiz!" "Are you okay?" "You're not sick, are you?" "You're not surrendering the kingdom to some evil warlock, are you?" "Why would you do something like _retire?_"

The king held up his hands to stop the flow of questions and comments. "I'm fine, and there's no evil warlock involved whatsoever. I've just gotten to the point in my life where I need to take it easy. Pass the baton, if you will. Spencer? Son? This means you will be the new king, I hope you realize. It's a tremendous responsibility. But of course, I will be there every step of the way to guide you for as long as I'm around. I have faith that you will be a good ruler. And my young ladies," he said, turning to his daughters, "you are now seventeen years of age. It is high time for lines of suitors to be coming around the castle, begging for your hands in matrimony. It will take some very special men to steal you away from me, but alas, I would not keep you from love if it is true. Your mother would have felt the same way. I have faith in you, also, to do me proud." There was a glimmer of happy tears in the king's eyes as he concluded his speech.

"Awwww!" said Carly, rushing to give her father a hug. "Oh, what the heck" said Sam, joining in. Spencer added his arms to the hug, but then pulled away. "I'm going to be _KING? _Of the whole _COUNTRY? _Seeattelonia will be in _MY HANDS? _That's awesome! I'm gonna be king! I'm gonna-oh." The spazzy prince slumped to the floor in a dead faint.

"Yep, the entire country will be in his hands" said Carly, looking down at her brother with a doubtful expression on her face. "King Spencer..."

_(A/N: Not a whole lot of Sam and absolutely no Seddie yet, but the bricks gotta go down before the roooooooof if you know what I'm SAYIN. The following chapters will likely be shorter, but they may also be longer, I never really know. Why did I bother putting that? It's like 2:00 in the morning! Wooooo!)_


	2. Stable

**Disclaimer: Anyone want to give me iCarly for Christmas? Because I DEFINITELY DO NOT OWN IT...yet. Bwahahaha!**

_In the neighboring kingdom of Edmondston..._

"Mother! Will you please stop combing my hair? It looks fine!" A disgruntled-looking young man stomped out of his bedchamber, following by a middle-aged woman carrying a fine tooth comb.

"But Fredward, you have to look your best at every moment! What happens when you finally meet you future wife? You might start attracting slobs, and I will not have a slob as my future daughter-in-law and QUEEN!" The woman started attacking the boy's hair again. He sighed, and surrendered. Ever since the death of King Benson, Prince Freddie's mother, Queen Marissa, had been obsessed with the future of their country. Understandable, but wasn't this level of perfectionism a little extreme?

"Mother, how many times must I tell you? At least until I'm king, I prefer to be called Freddie. As for my _future wife, _I guess I wouldn't care if she was a slob if we were in love. And if she loves me, she won't care if my hair is perfectly combed!" Having said this, Freddie ran and ran until he reached the stable. He knew the queen would never run after him because for one thing, her long skirts would trip her up, and for another, she always complained that the stables were "unsanitary." Whatever that was.

"Hey, Terrence" the prince greeted the stable hand.

"Why hello there Prince Freddie" responded Terrence. "I was about to feed your horse, Gigabit. She just loves the sugar cubes on a stick I make for her!"

"Uh...yeah, she does" said a confused Freddie. "Terrence, why do they need to be on a stick?"

"I don't know!" Terrence said defensively. "It makes them taste better that way!"

"Well whenever she's done, I'd like to take her for a ride" said Freddie, choosing to wait outside, away from the horse smell.

Sitting down on a nearby tree stump, Freddie settled in for some thinking time. The fresh air always cleared his head.

_A wife who'll be queen...hmm. That's a pretty tall order, and it's going to be really hard weeding out the girls who only want me for my title. I have no idea how dad did it! How did he know mom was for real? Obviously **I **know she isn't in this for the title, but even our kingdom had to find out that she would actually make a good queen. What kind of proof can you come up with in that situation?_

Suddenly, an idea regarding his own dilemma came to him. _It's not very good, but it'll have to do _he thought grimly.

"Prince! Your horse is ready to go" said Terrence, leading the dark brown mare out to her owner.

"Thanks, T" said Freddie, taking the reigns.

"T...I kinda like it! But it's a little too short. I _am _a stable boy, so what if I was T-Boy?" asked the man eagerly.

"Nah. If you're into shortening things you could go with...with...T-_Bo" _Freddie said somewhat doubtfully. It seemed to please the stable hand though, because his eyes lit up.

"T-Bo! I love it! Thanks, Prince Freddie! You want some carrots on a stick for yourself or Gigabit?" he asked, holding some out.

"Sure. I don't know how long we'll be out, so it's probably a good idea. See you later, 'T-Bo'."

After a quick stop by the castle kitchens and a sneaky trip to his bedchamber, Prince Freddie hopped onto Gigabit and made his way into the forest.

_Future queen, here I come._

* * *

"Hey Carls, come help me pick out a dress for tonight's feast" yelled Princess Sam. "You know I'm no good at it."

"That's not true!" said Princess Carly as she came in. Then she saw her sister's outfit. "Okay, yeah, maybe it is true. Let me at that wardrobe!"

Together, the girls prepared for their father's retirement feast that evening. Normally Sam didn't care what a feast was for as long as all her favorite food was there, but tonight was different. She really wanted to be supportive of her father in his decision, and she knew Spencer was still having trouble wrapping his head around being the next king. The coronation was only two weeks away.

"Do you think Spence is ready to be king?" Sam asked Carly as she was laced into her corset. "Ouch! Not so tight" she complained, rubbing her ribs.

Carly eased up a little, and bit her lip. "It's not that I don't think Spencer will be great. But I'm kind of worried about him. He could use a confidence boost."

"You're right" said Sam. "What can we do?"

"Well..." Carly said thoughtfully. "If we showed him how much faith everyone has in him, I bet he'd stop looking so glum!"

"Glum?"

"I know, glum is a weird word! That I need to stop saying now!"

"No chiz. And the plan?"

"We can start it off with a toast."

_(A/N: Character development. The plot unraveling begins! Was it too much to have T-Bo? I love T-Bo. And yeah, Prince Freddie's horse is named after a gigabyte. Gotta have his techiness in there somewhere! And if anyone wants to know, I'm mostly coming up with this story as I'm writing it. I have a basic idea of what I want to happen, but I prefer to write in the moment. P.S. Did anyone catch my reference to two iCarly actors in the first chappie? First to tell me wins a free imaginary phoenix! 'Cause they're awesome!)_


	3. Town

**Disclaimer: Ahem, the vicious pixies someone set on me were UNNECESSARY. Because I don't own iCarly, ok? OK?**

Prince Freddie had been wandering through the woods for several hours when he came upon a man chopping wood outside of a quaint little cabin. _I hope he doesn't recognize me _thought Freddie nervously. His clothing and saddle were obviously too well made to belong to any old commoner. He had to be of noble blood at the very least. _There, that's my way out. From this point until I return home, I'm going to have to be Lord Freddie, or Lord Fredward if they seem to know too much. _

"Hello, good sir" he hailed the man.

The man grunted. "I ain't no 'good sir.' I live in these here woods to keep away from people! What're you doing here anyway, in that fancy getup? Heh?" The man swung his axe into a log and leaned against it.

Freddie was taken aback by the man's gruffness, but decided to introduce himself anyway. "I'm Pr-Lord Freddie. I'm on a quest for something, ah, of value to my kingdom. Could you direct me to the nearest town?"

"Lord Freddie, huh? I'm Howard. And you ain't gonna find _anything _of value roundabout these parts! Heh heh, heh heh! The nearest town is just a few miles that-a-way" he said, pointing. "Good luck" he added somewhat nastily. "Maybe while you're there, you can get someone to make you a new face! Heh heh, heh!"

Freddie was so disgusted with this filthy hermit of a man, he spurred Gigabit away without even a thank you.

After another few hours of tiresome travel, Freddie could finally make out the shapes of a town up ahead. It was bustlingly busy, the inhabitants all seeming to have something important to do. It was almost like they were preparing for something.

_I have to find out where I am _Freddie mused. He dismounted his horse and began leading her on foot.

"Excuse me, ma'am" he asked a woman at a fruit stand. "But I'm not from around here. Where am I, exactly?"

The woman looked at him like he was crazy, but didn't ask any questions. "You're in the kingdom of Seeattelonia, in the town square, of course. Why, you can see the castle, just up there! Now, if you'll excuse me, I must prepare a large order! So much to be done!"

"A large order of fruit?" asked Freddie, intrigued.

"Yes, yes, the king's retirement feast is tonight and he's having all sorts of pies! I am famous for my sweet blueberries and cherries. The king knows this as well as anyone" said the woman, puffing up with pride.

"I'll take your word for it. Thank you for your time" said Freddie, as he bid her goodbye.

_So King Shay is retiring, huh? I hadn't heard that! _Freddie thought. _Then again, Edmonston hasn't been in close contact with Seeattelonia in a long while. I know father was planning on strengthening the bond between our kingdoms, but he never made it that far. Wouldn't mother be proud if I carried out his plans? Maybe I ended up here for a reason. _He glanced around. First thing was first: time to find an inn.

* * *

Prince Spencer was seated at the banquet table to the right of his father, but he felt odd. Soon, their places would be reversed. WHY? Then again, being king would have some definite perks. He could dedicate his time to improving the artistic side of the kingdom. Every other area was flourishing, but no one seemed to place any stock in painting, music, or plays. That was certainly going to change.

"Attention! Attention, everyone!" The king's voice cut through Spencer's thoughts. "My daughters have informed me that they would like to say a little something to our future king: my son, Prince Spencer!"

The guests applauded. One guest, the young Lady Sasha, gave the prince a flattering smile. He raised an eyebrow in return, smirking flirtatiously.

Princess Carly stood, clearing her throat. "In honor of Prince Spencer's upcoming coronation, Princess Sam and I have come up with something to show him how much we trust and love him!" Sam stood too, adding: "Prince Spencer, you're about to be SERENADED!"

"OOHHH!  
He might be a goof but we trust him with our lives  
He'll see that this kingdom continues to thrive  
Increasing our bounty by the number of five  
He's our big brother Spencer!

He'll better the areas where we lack  
We'll never have to worry about enemy attacks!  
We love him to death and that's a fact  
He's our big brother Spencer!

To show him we care  
We have now prepared  
A contest to see  
Exactly who's worthy

Out of all of our friends  
Just who will contend?  
On the journey to capture  
What will fill Spence with rapture:  
The most marvelous creature, a Beavecoon!"

The princesses finished their song with much arm flourishing. "Ta-da!" said Carly.

"Did you like it? Are you excited for the contest?" asked Sam eagerly.

The prince was still gaping at the display his sisters had created. He shook his head to clear it. "That. Was. AWESOME! Woohoo, you go girls!" he yelled, snapping out of his daze. The guests followed his lead and cheered for the two young women. They had never seen anything quite like it, but there had never been a royal family quite like this one.

"Heck yeah, I'm excited!" Spencer continued. "A contest to find a Beavecoon? You guys know I've always wanted one! Whoever can find one will be like, my best friend EVER!" The girls beamed, glad their plan was working.

King Shay smiled at his family. "This is precisely what you need to kick off your kingship, son! It will be great fun for everyone to see what the contestants will do, and you can show your fairness skills by judging. Leave it to my girls to be this brilliant" he said fondly.

"When does the contest start?" Spencer asked Carly.

"How does the day after tomorrow sound?"

"And the contestants have to be finished within twelve days, to get back just in time for the coronation" Sam suggested.

"Sounds good to me!" said Spencer happily. His mood was through-the-roof giddy and excited, but underneath that, there was a little _scheming_ going on. Little did Sam and Carly know, he was going to make this contest be for something completely different...

_(A/N: What could Prince Spencer be planning? Find out next chapter! The winner of the phoenix was...SimonandJeanetteAreBest! I can tell we are both super fans, yay! Haha her Seddie work is really good, so you better go check it out mah sistahs. [Or...brothahs...if any are reading this :P] CookieLivcat got it halfway right, so she wins a phoenix feather. You can wear it in your hair! There were two more characters from iCarly in this chappie. Anyone know who they were? I KNOW YOU'RE SMART ENOUGH! Smart enough to...review, maybe? Thank you for all the reviews/favorites/alerts so far!)_


	4. Courtyard

_(A/N: So just to clear things up, the two characters from iCarly in the last chapter were Mr. Howard [Howard] and Sasha Striker [Lady Sasha]. I know a lot of you got Mr. Howard right, but thought the fruit seller lady was someone. She was just a fruit seller lady. :D Thank you for being such active readers!)_

**Disclaimer: If I owned iCarly, would I owe my mom a bunch of money right now? I think not!**

Prince Freddie had spent the night at a local inn, The Bushwell. It was owned by the kindly Bushwell family, who had proved to be extremely generous. Freddie still had two problems, though; for one, he had no idea where to start on the hunt for a wife. For another, what could he do to strengthen his kingdom's ties to Seeattelonia?

He sat at the breakfast table quietly, absorbed in his thoughts.

"Would you pass the butter, dear?" asked Mrs. Bushwell.

"Oh, yes, sorry" said Freddie.

"It's quite all right, dear. You don't seem like the other young men around here, concerned only with the idea of marrying a princess!"

"Marrying a- oh! Oh, well, I don't know who'll I'll marry, as long as we're happy." _That's IT! _Freddie thought to himself. _Marry the princess! I forgot the king had a son AND a daughter! The last time Princess Carly and I saw each other, we were practically newborns. I wonder if she's pretty? It would serve both my purposes for being here!_

"Ah...if you'll excuse me, I just remembered I have somewhere to be. Thank you for the breakfast, Mrs. Bushwell" said Freddie.

"You're quite welcome! Have a nice day" she said. Freddie gave her a quick nod, and strode out the front door.

_I suppose the best place to look for the princess will be the castle _thought Freddie. It was just up the hill, so he decided to ride Gigabit there.

"Well old girl, you ready to meet my potential future wife?" he asked her, petting her neck. The horse just snorted, as if to say, _we'll see about that. _

* * *

The castle courtyard turned out to be open to the public on certain days, and Freddie felt very lucky for it to be open during his visit. But why was it so crowded? Surely there weren't _always_ that many visitors. He tied Gigabit up outside, and began to make his way in.

"Hey you!" said a guard at the entrance.

"Me?" asked Freddie.

"Yeah, you. You need to sign on this list of names before you go in."

"O...kay then" said Freddie, taking the quill the guard held out to him. He scribbled a quick signature, _Freddie of Edmonston_. "Do you always have to sign before going into the courtyard?"

The guard gave him a funny look. "No. We just need a head count for today."

Freddie gave the guard an equally odd look, and made his way inside the gate. _I wonder what that was all about. _Then he noticed that the courtyard was filled entirely with young men, and no woman at all! "What's going on here?" he asked a boy near him.

"Don't you know? Aren't you here for the same thing as everyone else?" the boy asked. Freddie shook his head. "I have no idea what everyone is here for! I thought I was just visiting..."

"Well you're in for a surprise, then! Prince Spencer, the future king, is having a contest! Whoever gets-" the boy was cut off by a trumpet fanfare announcing the presence of the royal family. King Shay walked out first to many cheers, followed by Prince Spencer, Princess Carly, and a girl with long, curly blonde hair who looked about the same age as Princess Carly. _She's dressed expensively _thought Freddie. _Maybe she's the princess's lady-in-waiting, or a friend of noble blood. It seems odd that she would come out with them, though._

"Hear ye, hear ye! You are all gathered here to enter Prince Spencer's contest, correct?" shouted the king. The crowd roared with excitement. "Then let the prince explain the rules!"

Prince Spencer stepped forward. "All right men, here's the deal. You are all on a quest to find a most rare and mythical creature: the Beavecoon! It has the head of a beaver, the body of a raccoon, and makes a vicious hissing noise when you get near it. I know, because I had a close encounter with one when I was just a boy! You will have twelve days to find one, all contestants returning by the day of my coronation. Of course, if you find one sooner than that, you may come back immediately. There will be no cheating, such as sabotaging each other." The crowd grumbled. "If you decide to team up with anyone, that is acceptable, but no more than two to a team. You may use whatever tools are necessary for capturing the Beavecoon, but you may not harm it in any way or bring back a dead one. I will judge the winner when you get back. Everyone ready? Well...go, I guess!" Spencer stepped back and Carly patted him on the arm.

Freddie stood there while the men and boys around him rushed to the exit. _A contest to capture a Beavecoon? Bah! I could do that in my sleep. I bet it would impress the princess. She's far prettier than I could have hoped! With her flowing, dark brown hair, and those sparkling brown eyes... _Freddie decided he would introduce himself to her before joining the hunt. He might as well, while he was there.

"Ahem. Princess Carly?" he said somewhat nervously.

She giggled. "Yes, and who are you? Besides a contestant?"

"I'm...Lord Fredward of Edmonston. And I'm going to get that Beavecoon first! Not just for Prince Spencer, though. For you" he said shyly.

The blonde girl standing next to the princess snorted. "You and everyone else! You men are all the same. If you think you can impress Carly by finding some animal, you're wrong!"

"Sam!" Carly chided.

Freddie's brown eyes met the girl's clear blue ones. "Well, _Sam, _that's where you're wrong" said Freddie defiantly. With a bow to the princess, he turned around and headed back to Gigabit, leaving the girl named Sam with a look of indignation on her face.

_(A/N: Freddie entered the contest! And...he doesn't know Sam is a princess too! He's been out of contact with Seeattelonia for so long, he never heard about her adoption. Now he's gonna get got by a princess scorned! I'd like to thank everyone for giving me the same number of reviews for three chapters that I got in all eight chapters of my story Naturally. I can see this is going to be my most popular fic, ALL THANKS TO YOU PEOPLE! You're all wonderful! You deserve your own beavecoons! But in the meantime...a little review wouldn't hurt ;) Next update ASAP.)_


	5. Trail

_(A/N: Uhm. I swear I'm not blonde! [I actually just dyed my hair dark purple, and used myself as an inspiration to make a character for the chapter "Drummer" in Cookie VanDeKamp's Super Seddie 100 Word Challenge, and she's making another story about the character, so YAY!] But even though I am PERFECTLY AWARE that Seattle has one 'e' in the beginning, I've been continually spelling Seattelonia with two. [The 'e-l' is intentional.] This was pointed out to me by my sister, Reflection noitcelfeR, as well as SimonandJeanetteAreBest. I think I spelled it that way because I usually write the chapters in the middle of the night and am not thinking straight. The spelling will be different now! P.S. My schedule is really weird right now, so I'm going to try to publish a new chapter every weekend. Okay? Okay! On with the story!)_

**Disclaimer: ABC, it's easy as 1-2-3, I do not own i-Carly...**

Soon-to-be king Spencer was full of so many conflicting thoughts and emotions, he didn't know what to do with himself. He settled for bouncing from foot to foot.

First off, THE CONTEST WAS UNDER WAY! Some lucky dude was gonna find him a Beavecoon! Where would he keep it, maybe his bedchamber? Was that appropriate? Second, WHAT WERE THE CONTESTANTS DOING AT THE MOMENT? How far had any of them made it? Ok, so maybe they'd only been gone for twenty minutes. But who made it the farthest? And THIRD, what were the contestants like, anyway? Spencer was bent on using this competition to help with something that had been concerning him: his sisters' future husbands.

Even though he really did want that Beavecoon, Spencer could care less who actually brought it back. See, one of the contestants wasn't a contestant at all; he was a friend of the prince who agreed to spy on everyone. Whoever was deemed kind, a fair competitor, and at least somewhat amusing was going to pass round one of Prince Spencer's courting competition.

Without knowing it.

_I really hope Carly and Sam don't get mad about me doing this _Spencer thought somewhat nervously. It was totally for their own good!

* * *

"Did you _hear _that jerkface?" Sam fumed. "The absolute NERVE of him! I'm gonna make SURE he loses!"

"Sam, please calm down," Carly begged. "I really don't think he knew you were my sister! I have no idea how, but you know, he could be like really foreign or something... Even though he said he was from Edmonston..."

"Aw, come on, sis. You're grasping at straws and you know it! You should stay away from him when he comes back, because he obviously is going to be after your title. I bet if he'd known I'm a princess too," she huffed a little, "he would have been all over _both _of us."

"You aren't jealous, are you? You kinda have your jealous face on. You can telllll me if you arrrrrrrre, because-"

"In no WAY am I jealous of you attracting that scumbag! I'll find my own man, one a million times better than _him."_

"O-kayyyyyy" sang Carly.

"Stop that!" said Sam. Just because this stupid "Lord Fredward" character had looked her right in the eye with his own sparkly- urgh! He was never going to be worth it, never.

But Sam wasn't great at letting things go.

* * *

_Soooo...I think I'm part of a contest now _Freddie mused. Not at all what he'd been looking to do, but hey! Might as well enjoy freedom as long as he could before someone from Edmonston found him. However, he'd never heard of any such thing as a "Beavecoon." He wasn't entirely convinced it wasn't some trick that was being played on them all. Whatever the case, Princess Carly clearly adored her brother and would be grateful to anyone who made him happy.

"Hey, are you in the competition?" A voice behind Freddie broke the silence. It was coming from a man on a white horse. He was wearing a full suit of armor, and looked to be a bit taller than the prince.

"Yeah, I guess I am. Lord Fredward at your service," said Freddie with a small bow, from atop Gigabit. For all he knew, this man could be important.

The stranger lifted the visor on his helmet, revealing a rather boyish face. "Sir Gibson. Pleasure to meet you." He too gave a small bow, nearly losing him balance due to the weight of his armor.

"If I might ask...why do you need a full suit of armor?" inquired Freddie.

"Isn't that what knights are supposed to wear?" asked Sir Gibson with a puzzled look on his face.

"Yes, but not ALL the time. How dangerous can this Beavecoon thing really be?"

"Aw man, that is such a relief to hear. If I stop to take this thing off, will you wait for me? I don't wanna be alone." The supposed knight looked so pathetic, Freddie couldn't say no.

"Err, guh, all right, fine! But I hope this doesn't ruin my chances of winning" he called. Sir Gibson was already out of earshot, having galloped behind some trees to remove his cumbersome suit. It ended up taking him half an hour to remove the darn thing! "Sir Gibsonnnnn" Freddie complained. "I know you want me to wait for you, but how much longer will you BE?"

"I'm done, I'm done!" he said, stepping out onto the path. He was now wearing normal pants, but no shirt. "I only had this itchy undershirt for the armor, do you care if I don't wear it?"

"NO, I really don't. ALL I WANT is to get a move on! Are you even actually a knight?" Freddie said skeptically.

Sir Gibson puffed up. "Of course I am! All Gibson men earn the title by the age of 16! I earned mine for taking care of a witch that kept kidnapping people. I _think _I deserve it!"

"Oh. I'm sorry I doubted you, I'm just kind of impatient sometimes. Can we start over? I wouldn't mind having a partner, and the Prince said we can, so..." Freddie trailed off awkwardly.

"Wow! I'd love to team up! I've never had a real friend before! You can call me Gibson for short, or whatever." He held out his hand for Freddie to shake. Freddie shook it, and said,

"Okay, Gibson. We're a team now. You don't have to call me Lord Fredward, it's way too stiff. Freddie is fine. Actually, I may end up calling you Gibby. It sounds more like Freddie, you know? Freddie and Gibby, brothers of the hunt!"

"Gibby...I don't like it. I LOVE it!" The young man newly christened "Gibby" howled at the sky. "Beavecoons can't stop us now!"

_(A/N: Witch...Nora, maybe? Heh heh. GUYS! Thank you so so much for breaking my review record! It may not seem like many, but I'm not very well known. Keep 'em coming! Also- tell me what you thought about iSam's Mom :D No Seddie...but still really funny in parts. What do you think? And Sam has a new look!)_


	6. Woods

_(A/N: I'm a bit late on this one D: See, while I actually have a fair bit of free time, my parents don't like me to "waste my life on the computer." I guess it makes sense, because they think all I'm doing is Facebook. Like there's THAT much to do on there! Also, I spend a lot of time reading other stories on here. Some of them are so good, I have to read more by the same author, and then all of a sudden *bam!* there goes my alotted FanFiction time. Sorries D: To make it up to you, I have forgone sleep to write you this chapter at 1:00 in the morning. Probably almost 2 by the time it's published.)_

**Disclaimer: The Dingo Channel stinks, you should be watching iCarly! Did I mention I don't own iCarly? Well. I don't.**

Princess Sam had a plan. Oh yes. And not just _any _plan; a plan that was certain to get anyone involved in massive amounts of trouble. It was a risk she was willing to take. Right now, she was in bed, asleep... at least, that's what everyone thought. The princess in the bed was, in reality, made of a few pillows and a very sleepy cat. What! Drugging it wouldn't _hurt _it, she just needed something to be breathing under there!

_Heh. I'm going to show everyone what this princess is capable of. That stupid idiot from Edmonston today just proved people don't know enough about me. He'd never even heard of me! It's not right! _Sam's thoughts had been traveling in similar circles all day and all night. She knew she was driving everyone crazy, so she decided to take matters into her own hands. This meant the pack of food she was wearing on her back, the horse she'd snuck from the barn, and the nets tied to the horse's saddle, were all part of what was really a rather simple plan: get to the Beavecoon _first._

The best part was, she wasn't even doing anything against the contest rules.

* * *

"Urgh...Gibson. Gibby!" Freddie was struggling to get up, but it just wasn't possible. Sir Gibson had managed to roll on top of him in the night!

"I don't want...corncakes...*snore*" Gibson rolled over, still unconcious.

"Gibby, I don't want to do this, but you leave me no choice." Freddie screwed up his face, and screamed a rather unmanly scream as loud as he could into the bigger boy's ear.

"AAAAAAHHHHHH!" Gibson sprang up like he'd been struck by lightning, and began running around in circles. "What do you want! What do you want! Don't take the pudding!"

"SIR GIBSON!" yelled Freddie. The boy stopped running around and looked at him. "Everything's fine! I just needed to wake you up because it's morning, and you were sleeping somewhat on top of me."

"Oh" said the knight.

"Do we even have any pudding?" asked Freddie curiously.

"Ah, no. I think I was dreaming about it. And corncakes. Man, I miss my mom's cooking!"

"Yeah. I kinda do, too." Freddie sighed. He had no idea what his mother was doing at that moment, but he was sure he was causing her unwarranted amounts of stress. He was hoping that, if he could accomplish his double mission of finding a wife and strengthening ties with Seattelonia, she would be too happy to stay angry with him.

"Well, what's the plan for today?" Gibby asked. "Are we just gonna keep in this direction until we see something worth stopping for? I'm a pretty good tracker, so if I see anything suspicious I can lead the way."

"Sure, I've never done anything remotely like this before. You said you stopped that witch; what kind of skills did you use for that?" Freddie was still having a bit of a hard time imagining this strange young man taking care of _any _kind of situation. Especially a, um, magical one.

Gibby thought for a second. "There was tracking, defensive combat, axe-wielding-"

"Axe-wielding?"

"To cut through underbrush and magic wands."

"Right."

"And I'm used to road travel, from following the witch's trail. This contest should be a piece of cake! Oh man...cake. We really need to get some food." Gibby rubbed his still-shirtless belly. "I'm running on empty!"

"Now that you mention food again, do you smell...bacon? I'm serious! I know we're practically in the middle of nowhere, but..." Freddie sniffed the air again. His nose had never failed him when it came to detecting foods his mother never let him eat. Bacon was a delicious forbidden item he took any opportunity to have.

"I think you're RIGHT. Who has bacon out here? I need it! The dry old biscuits I have can wait until later!" Gibby began gathering his things wildly, throwing them over his poor horse's back. "We have to find whoever has it!"

"Okay, okay! I agree. Let's finish packing, and then find the lucky meat eater." Freddie's brain was being overpowered by his stomach, and as he looked at Gibson's frenzy, he couldn't help but pack a little faster.

* * *

Sam had been traveling all night. She wasn't really tired, because she'd taken a nap earlier. She was mostly impatient to get a move on with this contest. The sooner she caught the darn Beavecoon, the sooner she'd be back to her royal comforts. _Royal, _Lord Fredwad! One thing was going to stop her though, and she knew it. It was going to happen any minute now. Annnny minute. Any- *gurgle glub gawok* And there it was! Her stomach was growling! She was hungry.

_This calls for a little roadside breakfast stop _she thought. She was glad that, unlike some royalty, she knew how to cook. She loved food way too much to risk being stuck in a situation where no chefs were available. _A little bread, a little bacon...or a lot of bacon...yeah, this is good eatin'. _She hummed a little while she fried it all up. The smell was making her mouth water.

All of a sudden, though, she heard a distant scream. Why did that sound like a man screaming? What the heck! And now there was a bunch of yelling. Had she chosen an unsafe place to stop? There was nothing out here! It was the middle of nowhere! _Mama's stealthy enough to do a little spywork, I think. I'd better see what's going down. I'll be fast, because there is no way on earth I'll let my meat burn!_

Sam crept through the trees, listening as the voices got more and more audible. It sounded like two men; one of them was listing something? And now the other one was questioning him. Sam got closer. "I'm running on empty!" the one said. The second one replied, "Now that you mention food again, do you smell...bacon?"

OH NO. That was all Sam needed to hear. She had to protect her breakfast from these hungry men! She darted off back through the trees, and looked around helplessly to find something to cover the bacon with. Sadly, it was no use. The smell had already permeated not only the air, but the young men's stomachs.

_(A/N: Brought together by bacon! Of COURSE. ;) I promise to update as soon as I can, as long as you promise to keep being awesome readers! I think it just comes to you naturally.)_


	7. Cookfire

_(A/N: I just thought you should know, it pains me more than it pains even you when I can't update! It tortures me from within! A thousand apologies, fair readers! On another note: who watched iGet Pranky? If you haven't...OMG. Watch it ASAP. Something Sam reveals...NOOOOOOOO! Also, I felt there was a large amount of secret Seddie happening in it :D There was even some possible Cibby! The episode as a whole, however, was just...missing something. In one review I read, it was pointed out that there was only one storyline. No secondary plot. I hope there will be secondary plots in the future, because it's not the same without one. Next episode: Sam spanks Freddie! lol.)_

**Disclaimer: The rights to iCarly? For ME? You shouldn't have! Really! Wait. You didn't? I still don't own iCarly? *sniffle* Meanie bo beanie.**

Prince Freddie and Sir Gibson crashed along the woodsy path, following their noses.

"There!" cried Gibson. "I see smoke!"

"Animal flesh, here we come!" proclaimed Freddie.

"Dude," said Gibson, looking at him. "Don't say it that way. Then I have to remember, it came from a poor defenseless little pig, that once had a family, and-"

"OKAY, I won't say it that way," said Freddie, leading Gigabit to the cookfire. Odd; someone had left a fire, with food still cooking on it, unattended? Freddie dismounted his horse. "Hey, Gibby. Does this look at all strange to you? Why would someone go to all this trouble, and then leave?"

"I don't know," said Gibby, scratching his head. "Maybe they went for more firewood?"

"Maybe," said Freddie.

Just then, someone jumped out from behind a tree, screaming, "AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" Poor Gibson fell off his own horse. "ARGH! FREDDIE! THERE'S A GHOST BY THAT TREE, RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!" The knight floundered a little on the ground, struggling to get up.

Freddie, who had jumped about a mile in the air, stopped, did a double take, and walked _toward _the figure (much to Gibby's dismay). "Wait just one minute! You're that girl from the castle! Sam, wasn't it? Isn't Sam a boy's name? You are dressed appropriately for that," he smirked, eyeing the blonde's boy clothing. He'd hardly recognized her, she was so dusty.

Sam growled at him. "As a matter of fact, I am very much a FEMALE. And I don't need your approval of my name, how I dress, or what I do! So back away from my bacon, or the horse gets it." She held up a twisty branch to Gigabit.

"Uh...what is that going to do to my horse?" asked Freddie, confused.

"It just so happens that this branch looks like a snake in the eyes of a horse. Horses are completely freaked out by snakes. You understand now?" Sam put her hands on her hips.

"Who are you, exactly?" asked Gibby, having finally stood up.

"I'm Pr-Lady Sam," she said, distracted from threatening the horse. "Call me Samantha and you die." The boy stupid enough to insult her clothing still didn't know she was a princess. Why not use it to her advantage? Maybe later she could have him thrown in the dungeon for impertinence and all-around idiocy. The shirtless boy seemed harmless, but there was still a chance he could recognize her. She'd have to be on her guard.

"I'm Lord Fredward," said Freddie warily. "I do usually go by Freddie, but I'm not sure a _Lady _would stoop to such an informal level. Side from your attire, I assume."

"I"ll have you know I'm dressed this way because I'm joining the hunt! I couldn't let some dumb boy get all the glory. Princess Carly is my...close friend, and she won't be impressed as easily as everyone seems to think."

"If you say so. In the meantime, I think you should rescue your bacon," said Freddie pointedly.

"MY MEAT!" yelled Sam. She quickly ran to the fire and removed her pan. "Ow! Ow! Hot! Whew, I think it's all right. Not burnt at all. Mmmmm," she licked her lips. Tearing into the bacon, she sighed with satisfaction. "That is some good pig!"

"Oh no, not her too!" wailed Gibby. "Maybe I should eat my old biscuits after all."

Freddie rolled his eyes. "Lady Sam, could you possibly spare a piece of that delightful-smelling bacon? I'm really rather hungry, you know. And Sir Gibson over here," he gestured to the conflicted knight, "will probably want some when he remembers how good pigs taste."

Sam glared at him for a second, thinking. "What do I get for it?" she asked.

Freddi thought as well. "I...won't turn around and make you go back? I'll help you find the Beavecoon?"

Sam raised an eyebrow. "And if I let you help me, I'll get all the glory, right?"

"No!"

"Then no bacon!"

"But, but, that's cruel! What have you learned in court, anyway? Definitely not kindness!" said Freddie hotly.

Sam just watched him, chewing her food.

Freddie paced in front of the fire pit. "You know what? Fine. FINE. I'll do it. BUT, you have to share _any _food you have whenever we eat. AND, you have to tell at least Princess Carly the truth, even if the Prince doesn't know."

Sam held out a greasy hand. "Deal."

"Deal," said Freddie, shaking it.

"I'm still really hungryyyyyyyy," moaned Gibby.

* * *

Socksley peered out from behind a tree. As Prince Spencer's royal spy, he'd been assigned to keep an eye on the Beavecoon contestants to see who could be worthy of marrying the princesses. So far, he'd only come across five men, and none of them had any desireable qualities. Too greedy, too unhygienic, too stupid; were there ANY good men left? Socksley vowed that, if he ever had a daughter, she would not be allowed to get married.

Right now, he'd come across new sets of hoofprints. It was a little confusing. First, two sets lead down the path. Then, a third set had come over top of them. Then the first two sets had turned around, and stopped where the third set ended! What was going on here?

Oho! Voices! Socksley crept through the woods. Ah. Two men and a...younger boy? Or was that a GIRL? She had long hair, dirty from the path, and yet she was clothed like a peasant boy! Odder and odder. _I think I'll be watching these three for a while _Socksley thought to himself.

_(A/N: Dun dun dun! Sam and Freddie BOTH don't know the other is really royalty! How long will they be in the dark? They're also being spied upon. Anyway, I didn't like this chapter that much. Ugh. I hope you all feel the opposite! I think I'm just itching to get past this filler-y stuff and onto more adventure. Do you realize this is chapter 7? I didn't even KNOW that! I usually don't make it this far, and I still have so much left to tell. So stick with me, and I promise it will get really good. Thank you!)_


	8. Horseback

_(A/N: Yowza, you guys! I almost started crying when I read your reviews, they were SO NICE! Thank you! Every time you review, you break my record, because this is my most popular story :D I decided to update a little early, because I'm not going to be able to this weekend. I'm going to be in Canada! America's hat. [jk])_

**Disclaimer: Teenage girl + not rich + east coast DOES NOT EQUAL THE OWNAGE OF iCARLY!**

Princess Sam could not believe her luck. As she sat watching her two new companions snarf down her food, all she could do was think, _Why? WHY? What the chiz did I do to deserve this? Of ALL the contestants to get stuck with, it's HIM! And that weirdo he picked up along the way! Now, not only do I have to share my food, I have to let HIM help me find the Beavecoon. And I have to tell Carly the truth! I was right about him. All he wants is her title._

"Freddie," Gibby whispered, nudging him with his elbow. "Lady Sam has been glaring at us this whole time. I don't know if I like this situation. She could be," he glanced around, "_evil._"

Freddie tried not to choke on his bread. "Her? Evil? She just has an attitude problem! I think she's not used to sharing. She has no choice now," he said, grinning. "Besides, you took on that witch, didn't you? She should seem sweet and innocent compared to that!"

Gibby shook his head. "The witch was definitely nicer."

* * *

When everyone was done their breakfast, they put out the fire and began loading up the horses. They had agreed to just continue down the dirt road until they found a village or somewhere they could ask about Beavecoon sightings. What made all three of them uncomfortable, though, was the feeling that they were being watched.

"Um...Gibby? Lady Sam? Do you get the feeling that we're not alone?" asked Freddie, trying to keep his cool.

Sam snorted. "Of course we're not alone, we're with each other! But if you mean, do I feel like someone is following us, then...only a little." She hadn't wanted to appear the scaredy-cat female, so she hadn't said anything, but she was grateful that someone else felt it too.

Meanwhile, Gibby was twisting around in his saddle every five seconds. "I don't see anything, but the hairs on the back of my neck are standing up! That is never good."

"I think we'll just have to keep going. We don't have any other options. It could simply be a contestant, too lazy to find his own way. It's not really in violation of the rules." Freddie frowned, and then something dawned on him. "Oh no! The rules! We're only allowed to have two to a team! This isn't going to work." He slumped in his saddle, temporarily defeated.

"Are you sure the Prince didn't say two _men _to a team?" asked Sam, hoping for a loophole. She didn't honestly want to travel alone if she was being followed; it was creepy, and someone might recognize her!

"Good try, but he said two people. One of us is going to have to find his or her own way." Freddie's gaze traveled to Sir Gibson. "Say, Gibby..."

"No way! I'm not going through these creepy woods alone! Freddie, we were supposed to be brothers of the hunt!" The poor boy had a hurt look on his face.

"I know, but-" Freddie was cut off by a rustling in the bushes to their right.

"It's the Beavecoon!" yelled Sam.

"It's another ghost!" screamed Gibby.

"There was never a first ghost!" said Freddie.

"_There's _my raspberry soccer ball!" said the young man who'd come out of the woods. He was carrying a crossbow, and stood there beaming at Sam.

"What?" said Sam, confused. What was a soccer ball? It sounded strange, she'd only ever been to dancing balls.

"Who are you?" Freddie asked the newcomer.

"Reuben," the boy replied. "My raspberry soccer ball fell down a seaport, but the paper's in the oven now!"

"Do you have any idea what he's saying?" Freddie whispered to Gibby.

"Of course," said Gibby, giving Freddie a weird look. It was crystal clear, how could you NOT understand? "He said he lost his girlfriend, but it's ok because he's found her now!"

"Whoa whoa whoa. I'm not his girlfriend!" said Sam. "I'm not anyone's girlfriend! Who is this freak, and why doesn't he talk like us?" Reuben walked up to her horse, and looked more closely at her. His face fell in disappointment.

"The toast gives bad advice. Seagulls didn't buy Melanie." He sighed. Sam and Freddie looked to Gibby for a translation. He rolled his eyes.

"He said, 'I was wrong. This isn't my Melanie.' I think Melanie is his girlfriend." Gibby turned to Reuben. "Cheer up, the popsicle's only 25% potato chunks!"

Reuben's face brightened a little. "Wisdom comes from baby crocodiles!" He and Gibby high-fived. With a sly look on his face, Freddie said:

"So Reuben. Are you part of the contest?" Gibby whispered something to Reuben, who then nodded.

"Well that's great!" Freddie exclaimed. "Gibson, you're the only one who understands him. Why don't you partner up? I'm really sorry it had to be this way, but we can still be brothers. Just...not on _this _hunt."

Gibby looked back and forth between his new friend, and his _new_ new friend, and sighed. "Well Freddie, you did make a deal with Lady Sam. As a knight, I know all about honor, and I couldn't ask you to break a deal. This Reuben guy seems pretty cool, so I guess I'll be all right. Best of luck in the contest! But not too much. I still wanna win."

Freddie laughed. "Fair enough. I'm sure we'll run into each other again, and there's still the coronation. What say you and I have our own adventure one day?"

Gibby smiled. "I'd like that." Freddie gave him a quick "manly" hug, and bid him goodbye. Even Sam gave the knight a cordial nod and a "See ya." Ignoring Reuben, she spurred her horse down the path.

"Come on, Lady Freddiline. We have a contest to win."

_(A/N: lol...Reuben. Didn't see HIM coming, did you? I hope I got his random phrases ok, he was only in one episode. And, dude. This story is seriously writing itself now. I'm merely a conduit. Wah! I'm going to miss iSell Penny Tees because I won't be in town! I hope it'll be on a lot in the days after it comes out. Don't tell me what happens!)_


	9. Candle Stand

_(A/N: Howdy, y'all! Do you know, I have not had one single flame in 75 reviews? CRAZY! It just goes to show what wonderfully splendiferous R&R-ers you happen to be. For anyone interested, I have posted a Seddie oneshot called "Practical Need." It's about how Sam and Freddie do NOT need to each other to live, but would be very different people without each other. Now, onward to the Beavecoon! Maybe ;)_

**Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to iCarly. .ylraCi ot sthgir eht nwo ton od I :remialcsiD**

Prince Freddie felt like he had been riding for hours. Hours, and hours, and HOURS. All he had seen was this endless path of dirt, stretching out for miles! It didn't help that he'd gotten himself stuck with Lady Sam. _You did this to yourself _he reminded. _You could easily have taken Reuben and sent her with Sir Gibson, or sent her with Reuben...but we all know she wouldn't have gone with HIM. I myself didn't like the way he was looking at her. _The thought startled Freddie a little. _For safety reasons, obviously! No woman should be treated like a piece of meat. _Freddie's eyes strayed over to the young woman, several feet ahead on the path.

"Are you coming or what, Lord Freddache? If we keep going at your sissy pace, we might as well forfeit now!" Sam tossed her head around haughtily to look forward. Freddie scowled. _This _was why he regreted every delicious bite of that savory bacon! Curse all pigs!

Meanwhile, Sam's thoughts were in a similar vein. _Even when I manage to shake one of the goons, the other one still insists on tagging along! It's infuriating! All he does is ride behind me and occasionally smirk. It makes mama ANGRY. _She stewed a little longer, until she noticed something in the distance.

"Hey, Lord Fredface? I think there's a village up ahead. We can hopefully find out more about the Beavecoon from the locals."

Freddie groaned. "Is it necessary to call me by degrading nicknames, Lady _SAMANTHA? _We're both nobles, here! Don't you have any respect in Princess Carly's court?"

Sam gave him the most dangerous look he'd ever seen, making him squirm a little in his saddle. "Don't. Call. Me. Samantha," she said through clenched teeth.

"Oh, but it's your proper given name, isn't it? You refuse to call me by mine. I'm only doing what you won't," said Freddie stubbornly.

"ARGH!" said Sam. She couldn't kill him; it would mean a search of the scene of the crime, and someone might discover her then. Darn complications.

It took them about ten more minutes to reach the village, which they found to be rather small. It was comprised of a gathering of homes, and a central square that included a small church and five or so market stalls. Business wasn't exactly booming.

"Hail, good sir and kind lady!" said a redheaded girl from the front of the candlemaker's stand. "Could I interest you fine travelers in a candle or two?" She fluttered her eyelashes in Freddie's direction.

"We're good, thanks," said Sam shortly. She started to turn away, but her companion didn't.

"Wait...w-we might be able to use one," stammered Freddie, taking a candle from the girl's outstretched hand. She giggled.

"I'm Maid Wendy. You wouldn't happen to be part of that contest, now would you? If you are, that candle will be a great help. They stay lit for hours." She gave Freddie a warm smile. He smiled tentatively back.

"Fine, here's some money, girly. Now come _on!" _Sam threw down a silver coin and proceeded to drag Freddie away by his arm. He waved to Maid Wendy halfheartedly, while she sent death glares at Sam.

Once they were out of earshot, Freddie ripped his arm out of Sam's grip. "What was that all about? I just wanted to look at her candles!" he protested.

"Oh, believe me, she wanted you to look at a whole lot more than that!" said Sam.

"Why should you care?" asked Freddie.

"Because...you shouldn't be getting distracted by loose women when we've got a mission!" said Sam hotly.

"'Loose?' How do you know she's loose? She seemed like a perfectly harmless maiden to me! One with manners, too, something you can't seem to grasp the concept of." He folded his arms. "If I didn't know better, I'd actually think you were...pfft...jealous." At this, Freddie couldn't contain a snort of laughter. Because really, why would Sam be jealous? They'd only known each other a day.

Sam blushed furiously. "She can have you, and take you into a house crawling with desperate females for all I care! I just really hate her type, that's all. Besides, you're one to talk; we both know you wouldn't have let me go with either of the other perfectly capable men this morning. Either that's jealousy, or you just want me for my food."

As Freddie opened his mouth in indignation, she added, "Oh look! A man who sells pelts. I bet he knows where to look for a Beavecoon. Let's ask him!" she quickly headed off before any more could be said. _Women sometimes _thought Freddie, shaking his head.

* * *

So...the little trio had remembered the two-to-a-team rule. Socksley scratched his chin. It was lucky for them he'd lured the boy who spoke gibberish out onto the path, or they could have been disqualified. How he'd done so? That was a secret. At any rate, Socksley was growing rather fond of the boy named Freddie and dirty girl who bickered all the time. _Sort of reminds me of someone... _he thought about the girl. _Can't quite put my finger on it, though. _

Once the newly formed _two _teams split up, Socksley was forced to keep track of them both. It wasn't easy, but he was the best at what he did. It was why he'd been chosen for the job. Right now, he was sneaking up on the knight and the strange boy.

"Hey, Reuben!" called the knight, named Gibby or Gibson or something like that. "Help me set up this trap, will you? If we put them up as we go along, we can check them on the way back home." He struggled with the large net he was holding.

"Here, I've won the mountain seal," said the boy called Reuben, taking the free end of the net. Together, they placed it over a large hole. The knight wiped his hands on his pants.

"If we set up enough of those, we might not have to look very far! We could catch all kinds of things in these traps." The two boys wooped and bumped chests. From up in a tree, Socksley rolled his eyes. Youth! He'd never been that way with his friends! Well, except perhaps the prince. The prince was a bit of a special case.

So far, these two contestants weren't really placing first in Socksley's evaluations, especially not the Reuben character. He'd mentioned a girlfriend, and no one could understand him. The knight had some promise, but he was a little bumbling. The best candidate yet was the boy who'd run off with the girl, but that very act was a strike against him. It simply wasn't proper. _I think I should go find them again_ thought Socksley. _I want to observe the boy a little more, and if that was one of the princesses, why! I would never let them go unchaperoned! Any young lady deserves to keep her honor._

With one last look at the knight and his friend, Socksley made his way back to the other team's trail.

_(A/N: So? How was it? I wish I could spend all my time writing this story, but I can't! Obviously, school and activites beckon. I've also been sick these past few days :P This was my longest chapter yet. Let's celebrate by trying to give a record number of reviews for it! You're all appreciated by me. And don't forget to check out Practical Need!)_


	10. Pub

_(A/N: This chapter is dedicated, of course, to everyone faithfully reading this, but I'd also like to dedicate it to my new peeps from the seddie or creddie forum! You guys crack me up!)_

**Disclaimer: I just checked the list of things I own. It included a candle collection, a family of stuffed bears, two loaded bookshelves, and a cloak I made. It did not include the rights to iCarly :P**

Princess Carly was pacing the hallway outside her brother's doorway, nearly beside herself with worry. Their sister had been missing _all day, _and no one had any idea where she'd gone! Unfortunately, Sam had had a huge head start; no one expected her to be awake before the sun was high in the sky. It was about 1:00 in the afternoon when Carly discovered the slumbering cat taking Sam's place. Darn that sneaky blonde!

Carly wasn't sure if she was more worried about Sam, what with her being who she was, or less worried, for the same reason. It all depended on her situation. They couldn't even rule out kidnap.

"Spencer!" snapped Carly, finally walking through his doorway. "I know you're all caught up in your contest and all, and that's just dandy. But if you didn't notice, OUR SISTER HAS GONE MISSING!"

"Hey, hey!" Spencer soothed. "She's Sam. You know she's way tougher than even that mutton we had last week."

"The really chewy sheep meat?" Carly questioned.

"Yeah, that," Spencer replied. "Sam can take care of herself. I don't know why she's run off, but it looks like she went to great lengths to keep us off her trail. Maybe we should just... let her be free."

"Let. Her. Be. _Free? _Says the future king of our country! Great! What kind of brother are you? Would you just 'let me be free' if I ran away?" said Carly, exasperated.

"Well, no. But that's because you're different people. _You_ running away would probably mean you wanted attention for some reason, and to be rescued, and it would upset you to not have anyone go after you. In this case, I think Sam just wants to be on her own for once, maybe to 'discover herself' or something. I could never really figure out the mind of a teenage girl." Spencer stroked his chin thoughtfully. "Hey, do you think I should grow a beard when I'm king?"

"Spencer!" yelled Carly.

"I was just wondering!" he said defensively.

* * *

After Spencer's anti-helpfulness, Carly decided to take matters into her own hands; she was off to the town psychic.

_I bet Madame Briggs can see if things are okay, even if she is a little grouchy _thought the princess. _She's pretty well-known._

Since she had disguised herself with a head scarf, no one noticed the royal girl passing through to pay a visit to the fortune teller. It was common for young women seeking advice on love and money to show up at all times. Carly walked briskly up to the little shop that read "Madame Briggs: Seer of Sights," and went inside.

"What, another desperately lovesick kid? This job gets older every day!" An irritable woman was sitting at a table in the smokey front room; she was wearing a plaid turban with a flowy outfit. She stood and motioned for Carly to come closer. "Well, don't just stand there, girl! Get in here."

Carly nervously removed her scarf, and sat down at her side of the table. Clearing her throat, she said, "I have a problem I was wondering if you could fix. You see-"

"You want to know who your one true love is, will you live happily ever after, yadda yadda." Madame Briggs rolled her eyes. "Let me concentrate!" She placed her fingers to her temples and closed her eyes. "Hmmmm. Hmmmm. I see... an unknown young man. He is tall...he is...shirtless? You are not far from meeting... you will live happily ever after, yes." The woman opened her eyes. "There you go, that was your future. Now pay up!" She held out a hand.

"A shirtless boy?" Carly questioned. "I really must _not _know him... But that's not why I'm here! My sister ran away from home in the middle of the night. I want to know if she's all right." She looked down, clearly worried.

Madame Briggs sighed. "That's a different case entirely! I'll have to get out my crystal ball. And don't be thinking you can get away with having your own fortune for free, either," she said suspiciously. She rummaged around for a minute, then heaved a large glass orb onto the velvet tablecloth. "Okay. I'll look for your sister. What does she look like? How old is she?" asked the psychic.

"She's the same age as me, seventeen. She has long blonde hair and blue eyes," described Carly.

"Fraternal twins?"

"She was adopted."

"Why does that sound so familiar?" Madame Briggs inquired. She peered closely at the girl before her, and suddenly she gasped. "You're not- you can't be! _Princess Carly?_"

Looking sheepish, Carly replied, "Yes, that's me. My sister, Princess Sam, has run away. As royalty, though, I command you not to tell anyone! My father and brother don't even know I'm here right now."

"Yes yes, of course," said Madame, hurriedly smoothing her turban and dress. Her entire countenence had changed apon hearing she had royalty for a customer. "Now where were we...yes. There she is! She's quite safe. She appears to be arguing with a boy around your age, he has dark hair. I can't tell where they are, though. I'm afraid that's the most I can see." She stared expectantly at Carly.

The princess sighed. "Thank you for your help. I have no idea who this boy is that she's with! I suppose all that matters is she's safe. But she is SO hearing about it when she gets back! Oh, by the way," added Carly, "the boy she's with isn't my shirtless stranger, is he?" _Might as well ask while I'm at it! _she thought.

The woman shook her head. "No, I don't believe he is. You'll know him when you see him, your highness. Even if I didn't know who you were when I gave that fortune, it was still true to you as an individual."

"I see. Thank you again for your help. It has put me at ease, at least for the time being." Carly grimaced. Sam was dead meat!

"Happy to be of service, princess," purred Madame Briggs, stroking the gold coin Carly had flipped her. It was a good day to be psychic.

* * *

"So, let me get this straight. We're looking for a cave on the far side of a mountain that's past a river that's after a canyon?" asked Freddie.

"That's what mister I-skin-helpless-creatures-for-a-living said," retorted Sam.

Freddie rolled his eyes. "Now I _know _you didn't have a problem eating that pig meat this morning." He coughed, and it sounded a lot like "hypocrite."

Sam glared. "I'm gonna ignore that, Fredventure. Because you are going to buy me lunch."

Freddie groaned. "This is what I get for not going with Gibby, and just letting Reuben take you as his 'raspberry soccer ball.' What do you want to eat?"

"Hmmm." Sam looked around. "How about that pub over there? I never get pub fare, living in the castle. They probably have some delicious meats." She licked her lips. "I can almost taste the turkey legs...ohhhhh. Get me food, now!"

"Okay already!" Freddie said. "We'll go to the pub. Gosh."

The two made their way in, sat down, and ordered the day's special: turkey legs with potatoes ("Ha!" said Sam). They were perfectly content to eat in silence, but once they slowed down, things felt odd.

"You know, where I come from, I'm not sure if this would be considered courting or male bonding," said Freddie with a slightly forced chuckle.

Sam swallowed her mouthful of potato. "It's none of the above, and you know it. We have a unique situation here."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," said Freddie. "It's not every day two young nobles get together to hunt a mythical creature for a contest. Especially not when one's a girl...or almost a girl," he teased.

"Hey!" protested Sam, shoving his arm. "Princess Carly knows I'm a girl! We wouldn't be best friends otherwise!"

"I was referring to your clothes again," said Freddie carefully.

Sam looked down at her outfit. "Oh. Yeah. I guess if my hair wasn't so long, people might think I _am _a boy."

"I don't know about that," said Freddie seriously. "There's still your rather feminine face."

Sam turned a pinkish color, completely against her will. "Shut up! I bet if you dressed up like a girl, no one would know the difference."

Freddie sighed. "And the torture continues." Yet he couldn't help but hide a quick smile at the reaction she had had.

_(A/N: I truly love writing this story, and I love it even more that there are other human beans (lol...did anyone see Guppy's latest interview?) out there who enjoy it as well! Your reviews elate me :) This is my longest story! And I'm nowhere near done! So, here's to a fabulous rest of the story *clinks glasses with readers* P.S. iStart A Fanwar. NEED I SAY ANYTHING ELSE? P.P.S. Check out the poll on my profile, and vote for your favorite character from this story!)_


	11. Holes

**Disclaimer: If I owned iCarly, why would I be sad about possibly not getting to watch it after next summer? **_(A/N: I may be going on tour for a year with this band thingy I'm applying for. PM me if you're really curious!)_

"Freddweeb! Get. Me. OUT OF HERE!" Sam managed to screech through gritted teeth. She and her not-so-manly companion had spent the night camping by the road, taking turns keeping watch. The next morning, she had been on foot looking for berries, when all of a sudden- BAM!- she was eight feet down a hidden hole! To add insult to injury, she was tangled up in a large net... and her only option for rescue was Lord Dufus. Who was currently laughing his butt off at her.

"Hold-hold on one moment," Freddie choked through his laughter. "I want to remember this forever." Clutching his sides, he guffawed for a good five more minutes before he could compose himself, during which a very angry Sam threated to maim every millimeter of his body.

"Okay, okay," said Freddie seriously, after he'd calmed down. "Can you at least get that net off of yourself?"

Sam grumbled. "What do you think I've been trying to do? You're gonna need to pull me out of here before we cut this thing off of me." She would have been unhappy in this situation no matter what, but having to rely on this Freward guy was making Sam even more agitated.

Freddie sighed. "I was afraid of that. Would you prefer I find a branch, or should I just use some rope?"

"Rope, _please_," spit Sam. Freddie retrieved a length of rope from his things, and tied one end to Gigabit.

"All right, girl," he soothed to his horse. "We need to get Lady Samantha out of the hole, even if she doesn't seem like much of a lady that way." Gigabit snorted.

"I HEARD THAT," Sam yelled.

Freddie rolled his eyes. "Just take the other end of the rope when I throw it to you." He tossed the rope into the hole. "When I say so, hold on tight. I'm going to back my horse up slowly to get you out of there."

"Fine," Sam muttered.

"Okay, Gigabit. Easy...easy... Lady Sam, hold on! On, Gigabit!" Freddie led the horse carefully backwards, and surely enough, after a few feet of backing up a blonde head appeared over the top of the hole.

"It's," Sam wheezed as she climbed out, "the least you could do, to," she coughed, "get me out!" She leaned over, trying to catch her breath. "I practically had to climb out of there myself as it is! Where's your knife? Oh never mind, I'll use mine." She stomped and stumbled off to her own horse, still tangled in the net.

Freddie stared at her. "Oh. And this is the thanks _I _get? I could definitely have left you in the hole to rot! I KNOW you wouldn't be very happy about STARVING!"

"Yeah yeah, and _I_ know you wouldn't have left me there," Sam called over her shoulder.

Freddie opened his mouth to retort, but found he couldn't. _Why does she act like she knows me so well when we've only just met? _he thought grumpily. _What's worse is, she's right. I would never leave a girl by herself, in a hole. Not even her._

_

* * *

_

As the day wore on, the prince and princess were extremely careful of where they rode their horses. And rightfully so; they came across five more holes.

"Man, someone must have been up ALL night digging these!" said Sam in amazement. "Guess where these idiot contestants lack in brains, they make up for in determination."

"I guess so. And I think I know who dug these..." said Freddie, pointing at a tree. On it was carved, "**Gibson waz heer**." Freddie snorted, "I think I need to have a little talk with him about his spelling."

"That's pretty atrocious," Sam agreed. The two rode on for a moment in companionable silence.

"So, I've been meaning to ask you," Freddie started. "What was your game plan? You know, for catching the Beavecoon?"

"Well," Sam thought. "I was going to ask around for any leads, and find out where I need to go, and then I was going to use my super-secret-Beavecoon-luring-device."

"I would question that, but something tells me I don't want to know," smirked Freddie.

Sam reached over and slapped his arm. "What Fredweasel doesn't know won't hurt him."

"There you go again with the names! It's like you think I have no..." Freddie stopped in his tracks. "Uh, Lady Sam? I think we found the canyon." The woods had been gradually thinning, and until now, neither of them had noticed the huge cliff up ahead.

Freddie gulped, wondering how they were getting around it, but Sam and her horse just pushed him aside, eager to get a better look.

"Are you suicidal?" Freddie yelped. "Get back here! Wasn't it bad enough to fall down a hole without falling down a cliff, too?" Gigabit bucked a little, nervously whinnying. "Why don't you stay here while I figure this out?" Freddie told the horse. He dismounted and tied her to a tree, then ran over to the crazy blonde.

"Isn't the view awesome?" asked Sam happily, gazing down the canyon.

"Yes, it is," said Freddie appreciatively, "but that doesn't mean you should be spooking your horse like this." Sam looked down at the creature, who was rolling his head and twitching his ears.

"Ah, Billy, you wimp!" Sam chided. "I wouldn't let us go over. Come on, now." She guided her horse away from the edge and dismounted. Freddie breathed a sigh of relief. "Worried about me?" Sam asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

"No! You're just more trouble to look after than you're worth!" he said, agitated.

A look of hurt flashed across Sam's face, too quick to see, before changing to a look of...murder. "If you think I'm so awful to be around, WHY DON'T YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE?" she said forcefully. "I can do this on my own, I don't need _looking after._"

"Come on, I didn't mean it like that," said Freddie, more calmly. "I don't think you're awful to be around. Sometimes unpleasant, I won't deny, but not _awful._"

"You sure don't act that way," said Sam stubbornly. "From the moment we met you've been nothing but disrespectful. Why should I treat you any better?"

Freddie gaped. "When we 'met,' you tried to make me look bad in front of the princess! I wasn't feeling very kindly toward you for that!"

"That's because every male between the ages of four and eighty-four tries to get close to her for the power! It's my job as her s- friend to make sure someone's not a crazy lunatic out to get the crown!"

"Well maybe I'm not a crazy lunatic!"

"Well maybe you're not, but you're still dorky!"

"I resent that!"

"I resent YOU!"

"Some lady you are!"

"You're no gentleman!"

"Neither are you! Wait...what?" said Freddie, losing track of the fight. Suddenly, Sam started giggling at him.

"I've never-ha-tried to be a-haha- gentleman!" she snickered. Watching her laugh like that, Freddie couldn't help but join in.

"I don't even know why we were fighting," he said between chuckles.

"I don't either. Let's just call it a truce and move on with our lives, shall we?" said Sam.

"Sounds good. We shouldn't be fighting when we have to figure out how to get past this canyon."

"We'll figure something out. I mean, I'm smart, and you're less stupid than the other guys," Sam smirked.

"Thanks. I think," said Freddie, unsure how to take it.

"Don't let it go to your head," came the response.

_(A/N: OKAY. Some thank yous are in order! I'VE REACHED 100 REVIEWS! :D A special thanks to KhCcGlee for being my 100th! You should all check out her story, "The Many Thoughts of Sam Puckett." It's going to be EVERY EPISODE of iCarly- as told by Sam. So far, it's given me a memory trip back to season 1!)_


	12. Cottage

**Disclaimer: Me, an obsessed fangirl, OWN iCarly? Are you feeling okay?**

"Isn't it better to sing when the lions are tip-toeing?" questioned a concerned Reuben.

"NOOOOOO! We've gotta keep going!" said an extremely sleep-deprived Gibby. He was currently running around in circles, searching for the best trees to put traps in.

"Halt!" said Reuben, grabbing Gibby's shoulder and yanking him to a stop. "You need to put that rainbow in a paper bag, and I do too. Can we PLEASE paint the bamboo now?"

Gibby sighed, losing some of his momentum. "Maybe you're right, Rube. We have been awake _all _night...and my mom has always told me not to do that... at least she thinks I'm awesome!"

"Marbles!" Reuben shouted gratefully at the sky. He and Gibby got out their blankets and made themselves comfortable. The fact that the sun was high in the sky wasn't going to stop them from get a much-needed nap. A little rest couldn't hurt...

* * *

"So what the heck are we going to do?" asked Sam. She and Freddie had been sitting near the edge of the cliff for at least half an hour, stuck. "I am NOT vaulting over that canyon. Or building a bridge. Or trying to go 'around' it, because there's no way that would work. Hasn't your annoying nubby brain come up with anything yet?"

"What does that even _mean_?" asked Freddie, irritated. "I obviously haven't come up with anything, or we wouldn't still be here!"

"I'm not stupid! I just wanted to know if you'd come up with anything in the last...few minutes," said Sam somewhat sheepishly.

"The answer is still no," sighed Freddie. They sat in silence for another moment, until- "Hey, do you hear something?" asked Freddie, tilting his head toward the canyon.

"Yeah, it's like a scratching, or a scrambling, and is it coming UP the cliff?" questioned Sam, torn between curiosity and wanting to beat whatever it was with the nearest stick.

Then all of a sudden, on the ledge about twenty feet from the two royals, a head appeared. "Heyyyyy, guys!" came a congested voice. The head continued upward and revealed a young teenage girl. She climbed up onto the ground and brushed herself off.

"What are you?" demanded Sam.

"Lady Samantha! That's not very nice," reprimanded Freddie.

Sam snorted. "Would you quit it with this 'Lady' business? Even if that's what I am, you clearly don't think I act like one, so you might as well just call me Sam. AND NOT SAMANTHA. Gosh, Fredstupid."

"Gee, I feel so honored," said Freddie sarcastically. Turning back to the girl, he said, "I'm Lord Fredward, but you can call me Freddie. Who are you?"

The girl looked excited to be spoken to. "WOW! You guys are nobles? Like in the court and everything? That's SO COOL! I can't believe you're talking to me and letting me call you by nicknames! I'm Amanda, but people call me Mandy, because I like to be called Mandy, since it sounds cooler. I'm thirteen!" All of this came out in a quick rush of words and air.

"That's great," said Freddie awkwardly. "Listen, how did you get up the cliff like that? Is there any way you can help us get to the other side of the canyon? We're kind of in a hurry."

"Oh, that's easy! There's a secret ladder RIGHT over there," Mandy pointed to where she had come from, "and once you climb down I have a little boat that can go across the river down there. There's another ladder on the other side, and I can take you to my house and give you food and stuff!" she beamed.

"Did you say food and stuff? Take me there!" said Sam, impatient to fill her stomach. She got up and went over to inspect the ladder. "Uh...what are we gonna do with our horses?"

"That is a bit of an issue," pondered Freddie.

"Oh don't worry about it! I'll have someone take care of them while you're on the other side," Mandy assured them.

"Are you sure?" asked Freddie, reluctant to leave Gigabit in a stranger's over-eager hands.

"Oh yeah," Mandy said, doing her best to look mature. "How old are you anyway, Freddie? You look young. Do you have a girlfriend? Is she your girlfriend?" she asked, looking at Sam.

"What? I'm almost eighteen. No, I don't have a girlfriend and she is most definitely NOT my girlfriend! Trust me kid," Freddie said with a shudder.

"You say that like it's the worst thing in the world," said Sam, slightly offended. "Being your girlfriend would be no picnic anyway, I'd be bored to death after five minutes from your vocabulary alone! He's completely available, Mandy," she told the girl encouragingly. Freddie glared at her.

"Awesome," said Mandy, batting her eyelashes.

"OKAY let's get going then!" said Freddie. He and Sam tied their horses to trees a good distance from the cliff, gathered some supplies, and followed Mandy over to the ladder.

* * *

After a shakey climb down the canyon, a treacherous ride in a leaky canoe, and an equally nerve-wracking climb back up the other side of the canyon, Sam, Freddie and Mandy found themselves back on solid ground.

"I am not looking forward to doing that again," said Sam.

"Why? Too dangerous for you?" smirked Freddie.

"Wipe that smug look off of your face! I just don't like doing that much work. I prefer to have other people do it for me. People like you," she shot back.

"Guyyyy-ssssss!" Mandy waved her hand in front of their faces. "My house is just around that turn over there! See that path? My family made that path. They settled here a long time ago!"

"Okay then...lead the way," said Freddie.

"I'll do that!" said Mandy. She took them down the crude dirt path to a small cottage.

"People actually live here?" Sam stage-whispered to Freddie.

"SAM!" he hissed. "Not everyone lives in a castle!"

Mandy turned to them. "Heeeeeere's my house! I live here! It's kinda quiet and isolated and lonely sometimes, but it's okay because now I have TWO NOBLES visiting my house! Let's go inside! You can meet my sister!"

"Your sister?" asked Freddie curiously. "Is she older or younger?"

"She's sixteen, almost seventeen, I bet she'll be really excited to see you Freddie, she doesn't see many boys," said Mandy earnestly.

"Well then," said Freddie, raising an eyebrow. "Let's meet your sister. OW!" Sam had just punched him in the shoulder.

"That's for drooling over someone you haven't even met yet," she said disgustedly. Freddie just frowned and rubbed his shoulder.

Mandy walked up to the door. "Sissssster! I'm home and I brought friends for us! Open the door!" The door opened, slowly, and the trio walked into the cottage.

A girl with straight brown hair and an odd expression on her face pounced on Mandy. "Mandy! Mandy you brought _friends? _You're my favorite sister ever! Hello boy and girl, I'm Nora, Mandy's sister, and I really love having people visit because no one ever come here since we live on the wrong side of the canyon."

Freddie shrank back a little, while Sam couldn't help but laugh. "Oh yeah, Fredward. She's perfect for you."

Nora's eyes widened as she looked at Freddie. "Are you single? What's your name? I can't believe how lucky I am! You're just like angels. One to be my best friend and one to be my boyfriend!"

"Uhh, uhh, look, Nora, I'm not really looking for anyone right now...I'm kinda on a mission with Sam here." _Even though that's a lie, and I AM looking for a wife, she is nowhere near the right material for my kingdom! _thought Freddie in alarm.

"Oh, that's okay, Freddie," said Nora. Her voice sounded equally congested as her sister's. Allergies? "I'm just glad you're here," she leered at them. Sam and Freddie echanged a look. "I think we just bought a one-way ticket to crazy town," muttered Sam under her breath.

"For once, you might be right," Freddie murmured back.

_(A/N: Is it even worth it to say I'm sorry/explain why I haven't been very good lately? I've been sooooo busy! I just took the SATs last weekend for the second time, then I got a nasty cold [that I still have] and I'm in the middle of a complicated application process! I still love this story and all of you, so thanks very much to everyone still reading this. AND iSTART A FAN WAR IS NEXT WEEK! Anyone see the history of Seddie and Creddie promo? It just about killed most of the Seddiers with joy :D I also can't wait for Harry Potter; I've carved, stained and polished my every own wand! ...yeah I'm a nerd.)_


	13. Barn

_(A/N: Whoooaaaa! "Extra" chapter in honor of today! OMG! I can't even say anything else about it. And who wished Nathan Kress a happy 18th birthday yesterday? 18! My friend just turned 18, and she was all, "you're next." Eep. Adulthood. But You gotta love Dan's phone call to "Natey" on YouTube, haha! Now read on, Mighty Seddie Warriors, and I hope you're wearing a lot of purple!)_

**Disclaimer: Well, I suppose I own the purple blanket I am currently in the process of knitting. But that has nothing to do with the fact that I don't own iCarly...**

"Beavecoons...Beavecoons... gonna get me a nice Beavecoon," Prince Spencer sang to himself. He was sketching a new drawing of his favorite animal, still unable to contain his excitement over the contest. It was wayyyyy better than being crowned king, and that is some pretty awesome chiz to compete with!

"SPENCER!" came the anguished cry from down the hall. Spencer sighed. It was Carly again, most likely still freaking out over Sam's disappearance.

"CAR-LAYYYY!" Spencer yelled in response, walking down the hall to her room. The princess appeared at the door, looking offended.

"Why did you yell at me?" she asked.

"Why did you yell at me? I thought we were just yelling for fun," said Spencer.

"Urgh, no! I just wanted to ask if you've heard anything about Sam. It's been two days now... Why hasn't she come home yet?" Carly looked defeated. Her best friend and sister had left her with no warning, after all. "Oh my gosh! What if she left because she's adopted?" Carly yelped. "That would be awful! She _could_ just be trying to find out about her birth parents, but what if she left because she thinks she _doesn't belong_? I could never forgive myself if that was why! I was teasing her about something else before she left...It's probably my fault! Oh my gosh."

"Yo, sis!" said Spencer, grabbing Carly by the shoulders. "You need to stop putting so much thought into this. Did it occur to you that she left when the contest started?"

Carly stared at him, open mouthed.

"Uh-huh, that's what I thought. She's probably off with all the men trying to prove her capabilities. It's weird though, because you'd think that Socksley would have reported that to me by now, since he's- OH MY GOSH! She can't be off with a bunch of men, she's just a girl! I'm a terrible brother." Spencer hung his head.

"What was that about Socksley?" asked Carly sharply. "You didn't somehow rig the contest, did you? That would defeat the entire purpose of it! Defeat it!"

"And I've been so careful not to let her near any boys!" wailed Spencer.

"If you have a man out there booby-trapping contestants and stuff, then so help me, you are never seeing that Beavecoon!"

"Not that most boys aren't afraid of her," Spencer added as an afterthought, looking slightly comforted. "_I'm_ kinda afraid of her. Wait, were you saying something?" he asked his sister.

"Only that I might have to have Socksley executed for dishonesty," said Carly nonchalantly.

"What! He's not doing anything bad, he's just there because...um...I can't tell you why, but it barely has anything to do with Beavecoons. Believe me."

"I want to believe you, Spence, but the whole thing is getting a bit fishy," said Carly, putting her hands on her hips.

"Heh...fishy," Spencer snickered. "Oooh, I've always wanted a fish!" Seeing the look on Carly's face, he hastily added, "Look kiddo. If Socksley comes back having done anything remotely wrong, then I will cancel the contest, postpone the coronation, and- and- donatetheBeavecoon tothezoo."

"Oh," said Carly, her eyes widening. "Well, I know you wouldn't joke about that. I believe you." She sighed. "But it doesn't change the fact that I miss my sister. Life isn't the same without her, even for two days."

"I hear ya. Everything'll be fine when she comes back. Which she will," assured Spencer.

"Thanks Spence," said Carly, giving him a hug.

"Anytime, lil' sis," he replied, giving her a squeeze.

* * *

"So then I told him, you can't put mayonnaise on a coconut, silly!" Nora finished happily. She had been telling her "guests" some dumb story while they lounged around her tiny living room, and boy were they ever glad it was done!

"Hey, crazy chick?" asked Sam.

"I'll ignore that slight and assume you're referring to me," said Nora. "Yes?"

"WHEN ARE YOU GONNA LET US LEAVE?" Sam bellowed. Nora looked startled, and Freddie rolled his eyes. He'd given up trying to get Sam to be polite to Nora after the first hour.

"Well. If you really want to leave that much, then I guess you can go now. But first, let me show you to the shed, to replenish your travelling supplies. It's the least I can do," she said sweetly.

"Yeah! Replenish stuff!" said Mandy excitedly. "Our shed is AWESOME, we have tons of stuff in there you could use! Like this one time, we needed..." The other let Mandy blab on as they tuned her out on the way to the shed.

"Do you have chickens?" Freddie asked. There were feathers strewn all over the ground outside of the so-called shed, and several bags of feed leaning up against the shed's wall.

"Oh yeah," said Nora. "Our best chicken is also my best friend. His name is Maurice! MAURICE!" she yelled. "GET YOUR FEATHERY BUTT OUT HERE! He doesn't usually hide from company," she told her visitors.

"Very strange," said Sam, bored. Just then, the door to the shed, or maybe it was a barn, opened to reveal about ten chickens. The largest of them waddled at the front, like he was the leader.

"There you are Maurice!" cooed Nora, scooping him up in her arms. Turning to her visitors, she said, "I'll just show you into the shed then. Come on!" Nora, Sam and Freddie made their way into the barn while Mandy waited outside with the chickens.

"It's really dark in here, can't we light a candle or something?" Sam complained. "HEY! Watch it, Fredklutz! Move it or lose it!"

"It's not my fault _you _tripped over me!" Freddie retorted, rubbing his foot where she had stepped on it.

Nora spoke from her position in the only sliver of light, by the heavy shed door. "Oh, I won't be getting you anything, Freddie and Sam. You see, I very rarely have guests over. You're actually the first ones ever! And nobles, at that! You don't think I would let you go that easily, do you? Please enjoy your stay!" With that, she ran out of the shed and yelled, "MANDY, NOW!"

The two troubled royals heard the sound of a bolt being placed over the door, blocking any chance of escape they'd had.

"I KNOW WHY NO ONE WANTS TO VISIT YOU!" yelled Freddie helplessly.

"NO CHIZ!" screamed Sam. Turning on Freddie, she yelled, "I don't believe this! How could you let us get locked up in this looney bin? You were supposed to be the man, however questionable your testosterone levels are, and you let us get overpowered by a psychotic chicken-loving girl and her wacky sister!"

"You're blaming this on ME? You're the one that wanted to come to their house for food! They didn't even give us any, and heaven knows what else could be lurking in here with us! This is just great. We'll never win the contest stuck in this- this cage!" Freddie breathed heavily after his shouting spree. "We'll probably DIE in here!"

Sam looked surprised at Freddie's outburst, although he couldn't see her. "Wow Fredrage. Didn't know you had that much anger in ya. Do you think you could channel it and, I don't know, GET US OUT SOMEHOW? Because I'm about to- AAAARRRHHHHHHH!" Sam ran and threw herself against the door, but to no avail. "That bolt must be made of metal! I wonder if the walls are any weaker..." she turned to her left. "AAAARRRRRHHHHH!" There was a *BANG* as Sam bounced off the wall.

"Okay, we don't need you beating yourself up," said Freddie. "There's got to be something in here that could help us!"

"It's definitely not you," Sam sneered.

"_It's definitely not you,_" Freddie sneered back. "You make me feel SO good about myself, you know that?" he said sarcastically.

"Yep," said Sam.

_(A/N: I have a dream. My dream is to get this on the Seddie wiki fanfiction page of story suggestions. It would mean I was really, truly loved! *sniff* Sometimes I wonder how I'm gonna tie all my loose ends together at the end of this, haha. But never fear, dear readers. I have a plan, even if I still have no idea how many chapters this story will have! So read, review, comment, compliment, [tee-hee] and don't forget to vote for your favorite character on my profile! Happy fanwar-ing!)_


	14. Escape

_(A/N: Ugh, you guys. I need to say two things: 1. I'm sorry and 2. thank you so much. I'm SO sorry about the last chapter. I wrote it at one o'clock in the morning, and I'm really not happy with it. I'm going to leave it and work around it, but UGH! I think I was rushing myself to just publish another chapter, which is not the way to do things at all. AT ALL. iStart A Fan War wasn't even worth the hype! But I'm happier after Dan posted that note, and since he Tweeted me! Anyway, lots of us go through a rough writing period. I think this is mine. So on that note, THANK YOU SO MUCH to the wonderful people who reviewed chapter 13. I feel like it should have gotten flames, not lovely comments. You guys mean a lot to this story, and keep me going. Please keep being fantastic :)_

**Disclaimer: Well I could write you a novel about how I don't own iCarly, or you could just read the story!**

"One bottle of ale on the wall, one bottle of ale..." Sam droned. "Take one down, pass it around, no more bottles of ale on the wall..." she and Freddie finished. They couldn't be sure, but it seemed like they'd been trapped all night.

"Now what?" asked Sam.

"Um, I guess we could just talk," Freddie suggested. "There's nothing else to do when you're trapped in a dark barn of steel."

"Ugh, well then if I'm being forced to converse with you, nub, I've got a question," said Sam. "Why are you so desperate to impress Princess Carly when you don't even know her? Are you really so shallow that you just want her title?"

"I'm not after her title," said Freddie, surprised. "I'm not like that. It's just..." he trailed off.

"What?" prodded Sam.

"Don't laugh at me. But... Princess Carly is my dream girl. I could tell from the moment I set eyes on her," said Freddie dreamily.

Sam snorted. "That's it? You took one look at her and decided? Bull! When I find the love of MY life, I'm not gonna know just from _looking _at him. He's gonna have to prove himself, because Mama doesn't settle for any old guy."

"Well, I guess that works better for some people, but it can work my way too," Freddie compromised. "Princess Carly is a very beautiful girl, and she seems very kind. Could you maybe tell me a little about what she's like?"

"Sure, you want to find out what she's like _after_ you're already in love. Uh-huh," Sam scoffed. However, she continued: "Princess Carly is everything you said, and more. I've never met anyone who cares more about so many things. She takes care of her family, the castle, the servants, her friends. She's my best friend. She's not perfect, though, I've known her long enough to say. She's got flaws like anybody else, and she can be a little high-maintenance. Some princesses get like that."

"I'd do whatever it takes to be with her," said Freddie determinedly.

Sam sighed. "I don't get why everyone feels so pressured to get married right now. I'm so young, why the heck do I need to tie myself down yet?"

"My mother is practically forcing me to get married," Freddie complained. "I've tried to tell her that falling in love could take time, but she won't listen to me! I guess it could be sorta important though, since- you know, never mind why. She would be so happy if I married the princess, though."

"Your mother sounds pushy. No wonder you turned out the way you did," said Sam.

"What's that supposed to mean?" protested Freddie.

"That you're an unsocialized pansy," Sam said smugly.

"What! That is completely unfair! If I'm unsocialized then so are you, we're both living in castles-

"La la la, I can't hear you and I can't see you either!" came the sing-songy reply; Sam had plugged her ears.

"Aw, come on, Sam, you can't just back your way out of insulting me, it's not...hey, do you hear that?" Freddie listened intently.

"What?" asked Sam.

"Unplug your ears!"

"Oh. What did you say?"

"I said, do you hear that? It sounded like- Mandy!" Freddie scrambled over to a small hole that had opened up in the barn wall, letting in light and showing part of Mandy's face.

"Hi guys!" she said. "I thought you might be getting hungry, so I brought you cookies that are shaped like Maurice! Here!" She shoved individual cookies through the hole, and Sam snatched them up in a blur of movement.

"Mmmm, as soon as I saw that chicken I knew I wanted to eat him," said Sam, momentarily satisfied. Freddie rolled his eyes, though he was secretly glad that he could see again.

"I hate to ask this Mandy, but when are we going to be released?" he half-begged.

"Oh, I don't know, maybe never? It all depends on what Nora wants, I mean she's the boss," said Mandy. "And I like having friends I can visit whenever I want!"

"That's what I was afraid of," said Freddie.

"Hey kid," Sam said to Mandy. "What other food you got?"

"I didn't bring anything else with me, but I can go get some stuff if you want," Mandy offered.

"Go do that then. Run along," Sam gestured.

"Okay!" said Mandy, running off. As soon as she was out of sight, Sam turned to Freddie.

"Quick! That hole is the only weak spot we know about, and since it's providing us light, we might find something in here to make the hole bigger!"

Freddie gaped at her. "You're actually passing up more food so we can get out? Huh. At least your priorities aren't totally out of order."

Sam slapped him. "There's no time for you, Fredsass. Get me that sharp-looking thing over there!"

"Okay, okay!" Freddie quickly retrieved some type of old farm tool and handed it to her. Sam speedily used it to wrench at the boards of the barn wall, and after a few minutes, created a gap just wide to slip through.

"Whew," said Freddie. "I thought we'd never get to see sunlight again. Ah, fresh air!"

"Yeah yeah, let's get going. Either one of the pyschopaths could find us right away, and even though I think I could take both of them at once with no help from you, it'll be easier if we just get as far away as possible. Now."

"Agreed," said Freddie. The two broke out into a sprint, heading back the way they had originally been traveling. Not even a couple of crazy sisters were going to stop them from getting that Beavecoon.

* * *

"Oh, no!" cried Gibson. "Reuben, wake up. I think we slept for a whole day!"

"Bumblebees?" mumbled Reuben sleepily.

"For real! Get up, man, we've got a contest to win! I can't believe this, I can't believe this. I'm just trying to make my family proud. We've got some serious trap-laying to do, my friend. ASAP," said Gibby.

"Slept for twenty-four hours...morning to morning...so much time lost... what would the king say..." Gibby muttered to himself as he gathered supplies and loaded them on the horses. If it was the last thing he did, he was going to bring honor to the knights of his family.

* * *

_I suppose it's time to head back to Prince Spencer for a report, now _Socksley mused. _Shame I lost that Fredward kid's trail._

He had been told to scope out all the young men of the competition, and he had indeed tracked down every one of them. Unfortunately for Spencer's intentions, only a couple of the boys really stood out. The rest were a bunch of unworthy dolts. There had been Jake, a simple prettyboy, Jonah, a conniving conman, Austin, a boy who just wouldn't shut up, Nate, Adam, Pete, and too many other boys that blurred together in Socksley's mind. There were two, and two only, that he had decided to keep an eye out for, and that was mostly for his own entertainment.

_Ah, Gibson...it was great fun watching you until you and your friend fell asleep for a day. Too bad really; I was just getting to like you after all. _While at first he had been unsure of the strange shirtless wonder, Socksley had grown a certain fondness for Gibson. The boy was pure at heart, had leadership qualities, and had good intentions. One of the most worthy out of all the contestants.

Socksley's other favorite, much to his chagrin, had completely disappeared! He hardly wanted to mention Freward to Spencer, as he might lose his place as top spy in the kingdom. It was simply unheard of to lose someone's trail like that! He had a plan, though. He was going to wait closer to the finish line, and watch out for contestants as they came back either with a Beavecoon or without. And surely, he would find that Fredward again, because he was seemingly the most fit for royalty. _I wonder which princess he would choose _he thought idly.

Which indeed.

_(A/N: Is it just me, or do people keep getting interrupted in this story? Especially Freddie. Sorry if that's getting annoying, it's something I'll have to watch. If anyone is curious, Sam is winning my favorite character poll. By a lot :) P.S. Feel free to request certain character's storylines. Let me know if you want more Gibby/Reuben, Socksley, Carly/Spencer, or just plain more Sam and Freddie.)_


	15. Cave

**Disclaimer: iCarly me no own. Me sad new iCarly never air on TV.**

Nine days. Only nine days left of the competition. Sam and Freddie were quickly growing frustrated as they ran away from Nora's house, realizing how much precious Beavecoon-catching time had been wasted.

"Seriously, Fredslug! Can't you move any faster?" Sam asked impatiently, stopping to look back at the huffing, puffing boy behind her.

"I can't- go- any- faster," Freddie wheezed, stopping as well. "Used to- riding horses."

"I can't believe we had to leave our horses behind. Billy is never going to let me ride him again," Sam grumbled. "Where is this cave, already? We've been looking all day, without food. Let me repeat that: Without. FOOD."

Freddie took a deep breath. "Don't think I'm not as hungry as you are. In fact, there's something you might be interested in knowing, but I guess I just won't tell you." He pushed past her with a smug look.

"If you value your life, you'll tell me right now. And don't pass me," the girl frowned as she caught up.

"Well, it's just, you know. There's a campfire about fifty feet from us," said Freddie nonchalantly. "I can see the smoke."

"Outta my way!" Sam yelled as she flew past him. He could only shake his head as he watched leaves and dirt stir up in her wake.

When Freddie reached the campfire, he was unsurprised to see Sam already gnawing on some sort of roasted animal. What he didn't quite expect was the younger boy tending to her.

"There, there," the boy simpered. "You can have all the artfully seasoned venison you want, but don't forget your promise."

"What have you promised him, Sam?" asked Freddie as he came up to the pair.

"Wuhtva ee won," Sam replied through a mouthful.

"Yes, this young lady has promised me whatever I want in exchange for some food. Bit of a weakness, wouldn't you say? But I'm being rude. Squire Nevel at your service." The boy offered Freddie a hand, which he shook. It felt like the overly dry hand of someone who washes them too often. Queen Marissa's hands were like that; she was frequently saying, 'hands that are sticky will make you get sicky.'

"I'm P- Lord Fredward. What are you planning on asking of us?" Freddie questioned warily.

"Oh, I haven't made my mind up yet," said the boy in his rather snooty voice. "I thought perhaps something with the Beavecoon contest... Yes, that will do perfectly. You two will come with me to the Beavecoon's cave, capture it for me, and escort me and the creature straight to Prince Spencer."

Freddie groaned. _Another _person seeking glory? How many were they up to now? The entire country? Out loud, he said, "We'll go with you to the cave, but you have to share the win with us. We've already teamed up." Freddie glanced at Sam, who rolled her eyes at him and snorted. How supportive of her.

Nevel hemmed and hawed for a moment, then said, "I suppose that is an acceptable term. We'll start in the morning then, yes? It's a little too far to get to before dark today."

"All right. Keep in mind we only have nine days left from today, though," said Freddie.

"Yeah and this dork has already wasted my first three so far," Sam piped up.

Nevel chuckled strangely. "Don't worry, my friends. I'm sure that Beavecoon will be delivered to the prince before the week is out."

* * *

The next day dawned bright and early for the trio. Freddie woke up with a bad taste in his mouth, probably due to the cheating about to occur on Nevel's part. Freddie really didn't care for the boy's way of thinking. Sam on the other hand was content with the food she'd been provided, but deep down she didn't feel great about it. As a princess, she'd been taught the distinct diference between right and wrong, and this had wrong written all over it.

"So," Nevel began smoothly as they hiked to the cave. "Are you two siblings? Cousins? Fellow courtiers? Betrothed, maybe?" He smirked.

"What? No!" shouted Sam and Freddie at the same time, followed by a quick glare at each other.

Nevel stared at them. "All right then... I myself will begin courting my intended rather shortly. I'm hoping the Beavecoon will impress her, you know? One can never be too accomplished," he sniffed proudly.

"Isn't there a law stating babies aren't allowed to get married?" scoffed Sam. The kid was barely sixteen! Probably not even that. Plus, who in their right mind would ever marry him?

"I am old enough to know love! I know I love my lady, and I know she will feel the same," Nevel declared with a wild look in his eyes. It was sorta creepy.

"Uh, okay, Nevel. Sam didn't mean to insult you," said Freddie with a pointed look at her. _Yes I did _she mouthed to him. "Anyway! Do you know how much farther it is to the cave?" Freddie continued.

"We should be there in about an hour. I hope you two have something to put little Beavey in," Nevel replied. _This is going to be a long hour _Freddie thought.

* * *

"And what can I get for you, my lovely lady?" Prince Spencer asked flirtily, gesturing to the many platters of food.

Lady Sasha gave him an amused look. "Nothing at the moment, thank you. Although I must say, this is a very nice gathering you're having." The prince had decided to start having daily Beavecoon-hunting progress parties while everyone waited for the winner to come back. It's never too early to party, he reasoned, and that way they'd all be around in case something happened.

"Well if you do need anything- and I mean, _anything,_ let me know," Spencer said with a wink.

"Oh, I'll be sure to," the young woman hinted back. After all, the prince was a very pleasing host.

* * *

"Yes! We're here. We've made it to the home of the most sought-after beast in all the kingdom. We've reached the Beavecoon's lair," said Nevel dramatically. The three hikers stood outside the entrance to a small, dark cave, none of them wanting to go in first.

"So... it's really in there?" asked Sam. She was barely able to keep the nervous edge out of her voice.

"Of course it is. And you two are going in there right now to retrieve it." Nevel sat down on one of the rocks near the entrance. "I'll be waiting right here in case anything happens."

"Yeah, because when I need help I _always _come running to shorty little know-it-alls," said Sam.

Nevel's eyes flashed. "You might want to be nice to me, 'lady_.' _I don't take kindly to insults."

"Okay! Let's get going on this capture, shall we? I've got a net, Sam, what do you have?" Freddie intervened.

"Eh. I've got a rope. We can tie it up without hurting it."

"Then let's go." Freddie led the way into the cave, gulping hard in an attempt to swallow his fears. It wasn't so bad in there, really... at least, you could see for about the first three feet...

"Hey, what are you doing?" Sam yelled from behind him.

Freddie turned around, bewildered. "I haven't done anything yet?" But it was then that he noticed the real reason she was yelling: Two large men had appeared out of nowhere, and were rolling a huge rock in front of the cave entrance!

"NEVEL! Nevel, what is this about? Are you a part of this?" Freddie yelled as he and Sam raced to the entrance a split second too late.

"That stupid squire! I'll have him hanged!" spit Sam. She pounded her fists on the rock, but to no avail. Stone wouldn't give so easily as the wooden chicken shack walls had.

"You don't want to do that, either, Sam," came Nevel's muffled voice. Suddenly, the rock move a centimeter or two and through a crack, they could see one of his eyes. "You see, I was never going to share anything with you. The Beavecoon was never in this smelly little cave. And you two are never going to live to see it!" he laughed evilly. Sam and Freddie could hear the two henchmen guffawing as well.

"I don't understand," said Freddie helplessly. "Why are you doing this?"

Nevel stopped laughing. "You don't know who I am? Poor, naive Prince Freddie. Doesn't even recognize his own country's number one enemy. A fine ruler you would have made! I am Nevel of Rue, Edmonston's greatest foe!"

Freddie whipped his head back and forth between Nevel's eye and Sam's face. Sam was turning redder by the second, and now more than ever Freddie wished he wasn't trapped with her.

"You. _You. _YOU. You're a _prince? _The prince of _Edmonston? _I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU WOULD-"

"Ah, ah ah! Those who live in glass houses should not throw stones, Princess Sam," Nevel cut her off. "Or am I wrong in thinking he's unaware of your identity as well? That's right. Edmonston is my main enemy, but Seattelonia is no friend of mine. However, that lovely sister of yours will be my one exception. You see, I'm going to steal the Beavecoon from whoever wins it, woo Princess Carly, and marry her! With you two out of the way, nothing can stop me. Have a nice last few hours." His eye disappeared from view, and there was a grinding sound as the rock was pushed back into place, leaving little light left to see by.

Freddie turned carefully to Sam. "Look. I know that I lied to you, but, you did the exact same thing. Do you really have to bite my head off for it?"

"This is all your FAULT!" Sam yelled as she jumped on top of him.

"I'll take that as a yes," gasped Freddie.

_(A/N: I deserve getting yelled at. And probably flamed. And I REALLY hope this chapter wasn't crap since it's been soooooo long! Oh gosh. You know what? I think I'm going to stop talking now and go hang my head in shame in the corner... But! During my little, uh, hiatus, I figured out the entire rest of the story! I now know how everything's going to go, which will make updating infinitely easier. I'm also not going to take three months until the next chapter. I love you if you're still reading this :)_


	16. Interruptions

_(A/N: Surprise! Another chapter!)_

**Disclaimer: Well, howdy there pardners! This here story is about characters from that newfangled-type television program iCarly. Ah do not happen to own that television program, and nor do ah own the characters. It's a cryin' shame!**

After grappling around in the near-darkness for about ten minutes, out of which came no victor, Sam and Freddie had lapsed into a miserable silence. What else could they do? They were trapped in the cave with no possible way out. It seemed all was lost.

"Hey... Sam? Um, Princess Sam?" Freddie asked tentatively. "You're not asleep over there, are you?" He braced himself in case she decided to jump on him again.

"No, I'm not, Fred_liar_, but I could have been soon. Might as well try to sleep in here while we wait to die," she snarled.

"Really, where's your royal perseverance? At least _try _to think positively... would anyone be looking for you?" Freddie was trying hard to break the tension, but he knew he wasn't succeeding.

Sam gave him a dirty look. "You'd think that, wouldn't you? So why hasn't anyone come after me yet? Even my perfect sister should have noticed by now."

Freddie noticed the bitterness in her voice, yet he couldn't help but ask, "So... Princess Carly really is your sister? And Prince Spencer is your brother? How is that possible? I've never heard of you."

"Yeah, well I've never heard of you either!" She shot back. Then she dropped her gaze. "I'm- I'm adopted."

"Oh," said Freddie awkwardly.

"Yup." They sat in silence for another moment, and then before Freddie could stop himself, he asked,

"Why on earth are you in this competition? I can't imagine any princess in her right mind would go on a twelve day hunting trip when she could just let all the men do it for her."

Sam's eyes flashed dangerously. "Is that how your kingdom is run, PRINCE Freddie? You expect the women to just sit at home and be worthless, pretty, possessions? Well that's not how we do it here in Seattelonia! I know that if Carly had been born first, she would have ruled this kingdom as the greatest queen who ever lived! As it is, Spencer is not going to let women be trampled and put down. We can do anything we set our minds to!" By this point she was shouting, and she took a large breath to steady herself.

"I never said anything about women being worthless," said Freddie calmly. "My mother has made sure I'm aware that women are equally as capable as men. She's raised me by herself since I was six, and you couldn't ask for a better queen of Edmonston. I haven't said anything before about you- you know- being a girl. Would you please just tell me the real reason you're so angry?"

Sam stared pointedly at the cave ceiling, mouth shut.

"Fine, be that way! I know you're just angry that I lied to you, and excuse me, but that's stupid! You did _exactly _the same thing, and you're being a hypocrite!" Freddie fumed.

"You wanna know why I'm really mad, Fredward? What really ticks me off? It's because I've let my _entire_. Kingdom. Down. HAPPY?" Sam asked forcefully.

"What are you talking about?" asked Freddie, stunned.

"Not only did I not get to bring home the Beavecoon and see the proud look on Spencer's face, but I've also managed to get myself left in a cave to die, while a maniac runs off to destroy my country! I've always been a letdown to my family, I know it. I don't know why they ever took me in. I'm not really a princess. So to me, it didn't feel like I was lying to you. Carly is the one who deserves to be royal, because she's so good at it. She's pretty, and kind, and helpful. I'm none of those things. I'd say she's better off without me if I can't even save her from our new enemy." Sam stared at the ceiling again, but this time her eyes had a slight glimmer to them.

"Sam." Freddie walked over to her and sat down, leaning against the wall. "Do you think I believe you're worthless after all we've been through these past few days? You negotiated with me like only a princess could. You found out where the Beavecoon was _supposed _to be. And you broke us out of that crazy chicken shack! As much as I hate admitting this to you, you've probably done more than I have," he said grudgingly.

Sam's face cracked into a small smile. "Well, you're not the toughest prince I've ever met. I'd actually say I'm the man of this team," she teased.

"I resent that!" said Freddie, but he gave a small smile back. "I don't suppose you'd want to know what I'm doing on this Beavecoon hunt?"

"Huh. I hadn't even gotten that far," Sam mused.

Rolling his eyes, Freddie explained how his whole adventure had begun, starting with the morning he left. "And my mother is so worried about me getting married, it's kind of driving me crazy," he finished with a complaint.

"I know how that is," said Sam. "But thank chiz my father's not crazy like your mother. Queen or no queen, she sounds out of her mind!"

"She isn't always that bad! She just loves me very much," Freddie defended.

"Uh-huh. And the Beavecoon's sitting on your head," said Sam.

"I don't know, though. What if my mother is right about me needing to find a wife?" Freddie sighed.

"Is that why you wanted to impress Carly so much?" asked Sam sourly.

Freddie shook his head. "I did before. But you know, I don't even know her. I'm starting to wonder if I've let my daydreams take over my head a little bit too much."

"She's probably everything you'd want," Sam said quietly, turning away.

"Sam..." Freddie began. "What you said before. About how you're not pretty, kind, and helpful? Well, I think you're wrong." _What am I doing? _he asked himself. _I guess I'm comforting a sort-of friend in need. Yeah, that's what I'm doing._

Sam turned back to him. "What are you talking about?"

"You've mostly been very helpful in this contest, like I said before. And you might not be traditionally kind, especially not to me at times, but I've seen a lot of royalty in my day. I can tell you care for your people in the way all the best rulers do. And as for pretty... I did tell you you couldn't be mistaken for a boy. There's just no way," he said, blushing a little. He hoped it wasn't light enough in the cave for Sam to see it. "Anyway, my point is that I'm sure you're every bit as worthy as your sister when it comes to being a queen."

Sam stared at him. "No one has ever said that to me before."

Freddie suddenly noticed how close they had gotten. "R-really? Because, someone should've." He trailed off, not knowing what would happen next.

"I bet you'll be a halfway decent king," said Sam, her face mere inches from Freddie's. Why didn't this bother him? It almost seemed like they-

"Heeelllllloooooo, anyone in here?" came a loud voice from the back of the cave.

* * *

Princess Carly was getting a little fed up with her brother's partying antics. Yes, her visit to Madame Briggs had calmed her down, but Carly grew more worried with each passing day. The idea that something might have happened to her sister was more than she wanted to think about. The princess watched as Spencer got ready to bid his guests farewell, noting that he paid special attention to the Lady Sasha. _Hmmm. That's useful information for later! _Carly thought.

Just then, a herald ran excitedly into the reception hall, interrupting the party. "Prince Spencer! News for you!" Carly immediately thought of Sam, wandering around in the woods. _Could they have found her? _she thought anxiously.

* * *

_(A/N: Okay I must apologize for the shortness of this. But, think of it as a bonus/cliffhanger chapter since it's only been three days since the last one! Yeah... that'll do...)_


	17. Rescue

_(A/N: Oooooh! So close to 200 reviews, and I just know my lovely readers will break it with this chapter. Due to this momentous occasion, I'd like to dedicate this chapter to all of you. You are the ones who have made this story come to life. Thank you so much.)_

**Disclaimer: Yeah, chapter 17! That's my age! Wait that doesn't go here...oh right. iCarly is not mine. Not even a little bit.**

Socksley felt like crawling into a hole to die, and he was already halfway there. HOW he had managed to get himself stuck in one of those buffoons' traps, he'd never know! He had been on his way back to the castle to set up a small spying area when he tripped, landing in a deep and slippery Beavecoon-catching hole.

"All my stupid fault... Let that Fredward kid get away," he muttered as he paced the bottom of the trap. It was pretty impressively large, with absolutely nothing to aid him in an escape attempt. Perfect for catching Beavecoons.

And perfect for catching Socksleys.

_Ah, but what's that? _he thought eagerly. Someone, or something, was crashing through the nearby underbrush.

"You boys go on ahead, I'll catch up to you soon. I saw a stream over there and I'd like to freshen myself up, if you please," sniffed a high voice. A girl? No... It sounded like a young boy.

"'Kay, boss," a man's voice rumbled. From Socksley's hole, it sounded like two horses began to gallop away.

"Finally, a little me time," sighed the boy. It sounded like he had a horse as well, but was leading it on foot. The noises drew nearer.

_Will it be a good thing if he finds me? _Socksley wondered. _I don't know if he would be much help. Although, it sounded like he was in charge of the other men. Perhaps I'll just listen a bit longer._

"Be good now, Toppy, while I wash up," the boy presumably told his horse. There were crunching sounds as he walked away, then-

"AAAAAAAAHHHHH!" He tripped and landed exactly like Socksley had, in the same spot. "Uuunghh..." the boy slowly stood up, then stopped when he saw he had company. "AAAAAAAAHHHHH!" he screamed again. "Why am I not alone?"

"Well, boy, if you'd calm down, I'd give you an explanation," Socksley said plainly.

The child looked offended. "I'm not just some _boy_, you insolent fool! I am Nevel of Rue!"

"Hmm. I am Socksley of Seattelonia, and now that you mention it, I do know who you are." Socksley folded his arms and glared over at Nevel.

"Y-you? You're Socksley? The prince's top spy?" Nevel's face paled.

"Yes, and you're on the top ten wanted list! If we ever get out of here, you are under immediate arrest."

Nevel shrank back, then paused. "Are you telling me we're stuck down here? After I sent my men away from me? What kind of spy are you!"

"The kind who just caught himself a valuable villian," said Socksley menacingly.

* * *

"Yoo-hoo! Sam and Freddie? Are you in here?" yelled a girl's voice.

"Mandy?" asked Freddie, unsure if he believed his own ears.

"Freddie? Did I hear you?" Mandy called.

"We're here, Mandy! At the front of the cave!" Freddie yelled back.

"Oh, okay! I'm coming!" As Mandy's voice got closer, a small light became visible; she was carrying a candle. "Hi you guys!" she beamed, clearly happy to see them, even in their current situation.

"Do you have food?" Sam questioned urgently.

"I have all kinds of stuff! I'm here to rescue you, duh. Follow me!" Mandy turned as though to go to the back of the cave, but Freddie stopped her.

"Mandy, not that having a rescuer doesn't make me happy, but where are you going? How did you even get in here?"

"Ha! That's easy," she snorted. "I just followed you guys after you ran away. See, I didn't really wanna make you guys go back to Nora, because she wouldn't let me play with you. So I followed you and thought maybe I could just live with you from now on!"

"Yeah, but how did you get in here?" Sam asked suspiciously.

"I saw you guys get tricked by that _mean _boy, sooo not nice of him, and I knew he was gonna leave you in my singing cave. There are two entrances, but the mean stupid boy doesn't know that. Obviously. I went in the back way." Mandy looked very proud of herself.

"Nice work, kid," said Freddie. "Lead the way out of here!"

As the three made their way through the cave, though, Mandy suddenly burst into a song. The lyrics were about wishing she could be one of the cave-bats; she had barely made it to the chorus when Sam stopped her, saying, "This ain't a musical, kid." They hadn't known she meant it was her "singing cave" in such a literal way! It was a very long ten-minute walk.

Finally, past a tiny trickle of a stream, the second entrance greeted them with bright rays of sunshine.

"Ahhhh, I feel alive again." Sam stretched her arms out like she'd been cramped.

"We owe you a big one, Mandy," Freddie thanked the girl. "You might not know it, but you've saved a lot more than just our lives."

"But I didn't even take you to your horses yet! While you were in there all night, I snuck back to my house to get supplies and stuff for you. Your horses are waiting right where you left them." Mandy led them past the cave. "C'mon!"

To the two royals' surprise, they found themselves back at the canyon where their troubles had begun. "You know your way around this place," said Sam, impressed. "I'd say Nevel walked us in a giant circle yesterday."

"That could have been to confuse us..." said Freddie doubtfully.

"Yes, but did he confuse us, or himself?" Sam said pointedly.

* * *

After promising Mandy a visit to a castle one day, (they didn't bother to say which) Freddie and Sam reunited with their horses and trotted off. Unfortunately, there were right back to where they had been before the ordeal.

"Princess?" asked Freddie hesitantly. Sam look at him with raised eyebrows.

"What did you call me? I've been telling you since the day we met, if you don't call me Sam you will be very sorry!" She went back to eating Mandy's fresh bread. "What are you trying to bother me with now?"

"I really didn't want it to come to this, but I've been thinking. We have barely eight days left of the hunt, right? And we have no leads. We've already been trapped twice by two different lunatics, and if we go any farther we'll reach the kingdom limits. It's not that we can't search on our way back. I just think, at this point, it might be better to abandon the quest altogether." Freddie ducked his head, waiting for the verbal beating he was sure to receive.

Sam continued to tear into her bread. "I agree."

"Come on, Sam, if we keep going- wait, did you say you agree?" Freddie asked in surprise.

She shrugged. "We had a near-death experience back there. And, after your sappy pep talk, somehow I don't feel as desperate to be the winner. Simple as that."

Freddie looked at her for a second, then said, "That was way easier than I imagined."

"I've learned this trip that maybe..." Sam paused. "You win some, you lose some. It's not exactly something they teach you in princess school. There, it's basically, 'you win everything or you're not good at being in charge'. Honestly, I hated those lessons anyway."

"There's more to you than meets the eye, isn't there?" said Freddie thoughtfully. Sam glanced at him sideways.

"Not the case with you. What you see is what you get."

"And what do you see?" Freddie met Sam's eyes, challenging her.

"Uh," she said, losing her cool for a second. "I see a nubby prince who's about to lose a race." With that, she spurred Billy into a gallop, racing through the trees like her life depended on it.

_You win some, you lose some, huh?_ Freddie thought as he watched her go. _Maybe I'll let her win this one. _

_(A/N: Okay, so I didn't like this chapter terribly much. I hope you feel differently! On another note, who's watching iPity The Nevel? I know I am! P.S. Happy St. Patrick's Day.)_


	18. Surprises

**Disclaimer: What? You think I'm actually Dan Schneider, and I've been forced by the, er, network to have a painfully long hiatus? Okay. You can totally believe that. At least this is a long chapter...heh...**

"Do you find it at all strange that we haven't come across any of the other contestants yet?" asked Freddie. They weren't far from the castle now, yet they hadn't encountered a single other person.

Sam thought for a moment. "Well, now that you mention it, I haven't seen anyone. Just a bunch of stupid traps left unattended."

"That's what I thought... what do you think it means?" Before Freddie could give it any more thought, though, the two heard a sound they'd hoped never to hear.

A dragon roar.

"Uhm, w- uh, where is that coming from?" said Sam with a poorly disguised gulp of fear.

"O-over there," sad Freddie shakily. He pointed to a clump of apple trees just off the path; the trees shook with the force of the noise coming from them.

"We need to get out of-" Sam was cut off by the loudest roar yet as the creature suddenly came into view. The dragon was beautiful in a terrible sort of way, about the size of a small livestock shed, with glittering blue scales and gleaming fangs and claws. Its wings unfolded, and it became apparent just how much space it could take up if it wanted to.

"Don't make any sudden movements," Freddie whispered urgently. "Steady, girl!" he commanded Gigabit. She and Billy were just realizing what was in front of them, and naturally, they didn't like it one bit.

"I've never been told what to do to prepare for this kind of situation!" Sam hissed. Unfortunately, the dragon heard her, and interpreted the whispering as some sort of dragon insult. Spewing golden flames as far as ten feet from its mouth, it charged Sam, Freddie, and their horses with a horrible scream of a roar.

"TAKE COVER!" yelled Freddie, spurring Gigabit to the left as Sam steered Billy to the right. "Oh no, of course," Freddie groaned as he caught sight of a glimmer of gold. "Sam! This dragon is an extremely protective mother! I can see her nest in the apple trees!"

"Well let's eat those bad babies then!" Sam yelled back. She swerved as a flame missed her head by an inch.

_That was too close _Freddie thought. _What if her hair caught on fire or something?_ Looking desperately around, his eyes settled on a grouping of large rocks not far from the dragon's nest. _A-ha! Now I just need to get close enough to them._ Freddie dismounted Gigabit and led her behind a tree, where she snorted and dug her hooves in the ground nervously. "It's okay, girl. I just need to take care of something and it'll all be fine," Freddie tried to reassure her.

"Ugh! You stupid beast! I don't really want to eat your dumb babies, their skin is too tough!" Sam was yelling angrily. She ducked, and again barely missed having her head roasted. Pulling to a quick stop to check for embers, she hoped the dragon would only be interested in a moving target. "Hey, maybe my plan worked," she muttered. The roaring behind her had suddenly come to a stop . "I have no idea where it went though- AAAAAHHHHHH!" Sam let loose her first scream of the ordeal as the dragon flew right in front of her. It seemed to be almost grinning at her as it took in her terror. "FREDDIE, YOU'D BETTER GET THE CHIZ OVER HERE AND SAVE. ME. NOW."

Just then, Freddie popped up directly behind the beast, carrying an armful of rocks. "Feast on this, Mama Lizard!" he yelled as he hurled a big one at the dragon's head. The dragon blinked as the rock bounced off her head like a pebble. She slowly turned, looking for the pest getting in the way of her next meal.

"That was a bad idea," Freddie whimpered. The dragon smoothly bared her teeth at him, then began to charge once more, when-

Plonk! A rock that was nearly boulder-sized smacked into the dragon's ear. For a second she swayed, looking very dazed. Then she fell over, with a thud that seemed to shake the earth.

"_Sam?"_ Freddie asked incredulously. "You just threw that giant rock and _knocked out _a dragon?"

Sam stood next to Billy, looking a little unsettled and unsure of what had just happened. Her arms were still in throwing position. "I guess... I did?" she said, making it sound more like a question than a statement.

Freddie walked carefully up to the dragon. "She's definitely not dead. Actually, can you come here a second? I think... I think she's snoring." He stared at the magnificent blue beast for a moment, then looked back up at Sam. Sam walked over to join him.

"I think... she is," said Sam in amazement. She snorted at the sound, which made Freddie snort, and before they knew it they were clutching their sides from laughing so hard.

"I've never seen anyone take out a dragon with just a rock! And now it's snoring! _Snoring_!" Freddie gasped.

"Yeah, well I've never heard anyone call a dragon 'Mama Lizard' either!" Sam choked. "But it was, it was, haha. It was so stupid of you to have done that." Sam breathed deeply to calm herself down a bit. "It was really, _really _stupid of you. Why did you risk yourself like that, you idiot?"

"I couldn't let her roast you alive," said Freddie quietly.

"But you're more important than I am!" Sam said insistently. "You're the heir to an entire kingdom!"

"That doesn't make me more important than you," Freddie replied. "Besides, what good will this entire journey have been to me if I lose you now?"

"What are you saying?" asked Sam suspiciously.

"I'm saying that, maybe it took a dragon attack for me to realize. To realize... well, this." Freddie took a deep breath as though bracing himself for something.

And then he kissed Sam.

* * *

Sam's thoughts became a large jumbled mess the second Freddie's lips touched hers. First she gets attacked by a dragon, and now this? _I can't believe this is happening. I can't believe I'm letting this happen. What _is_ happening, anyway? _Through her mental fog, she decided to let him kiss her until she could make sense of the situation. _It's not like it's that bad, really. Oh chiz, what am I doing? _Luckily, Freddie chose that moment to pull away. He looked at her anxiously, waiting for her response. "Uh..."

"Well fry my schnitzel pudding and flay my laundry upside-down! Ahoy!"

"Reuben?" asked Sam in disbelief as the odd boy came running up to them.

"What are you doing here?" Freddie questioned, a little miffed he didn't even get to have an answer from Sam. "You and Sir Gibson are alright... right?"

Reuben stumbled closer. "Gibby and I were flipping the notebook bushes, but everything's walruses now!" he beamed, clearly excited about something.

"Is he saying what I _think _he's saying?" asked Sam, raising her eyebrows.

"Somehow I doubt that," Freddie said dryly. "From his state of complete madness, I'd say Reuben didn't get any sleep last night."

"Nope!" said Reuben giddily. "The bucktoothed ringtail is in the bag!"

"Ughh, I can't understand a single word that comes out of his mouth," Sam groaned.

"Wait! Bucktoothed... ringtail? Reuben, are you trying to say that the Beavecoon has been captured?" asked Freddie. If he was right, that was some pretty big news, and at least somewhat explained Reuben's sleeplessness.

"That's what I've been trying to tell you all along," said Reuben indignantly. With a startling whoop, he took off running again, yelling behind him, "Lunchtime for the big bears!"

Freddie and Sam stared after him. "Just in case it really is lunchtime for the big bears, I say we get out of here," said Freddie, shaking his head in amazement.

"I couldn't agree more. Not that I'm scared. I just need to know what idiot snatched the Beavecoon away from me!" Sam said through gritted teeth. "I may not care about winning anymore, but that doesn't make it okay for someone else to."

"Come on, Princess." Freddie gave her a funny half-smile. "We've got a raving lunatic to follow."

* * *

The princess and prince followed Reuben's trail for the rest of the day, all the way until sunset. They didn't say more than a few words to each other the whole ride back to the castle, for fear of mentioning the earlier events of the day. And it wasn't the dragon they were thinking about.

"I think I can see the castle now." Freddie broke the silence. "Over that way?"

"Yep. Home sweet home, I guess," said Sam. She looked down, seeming a bit disheartened by something. Freddie noticed.

"Hey, don't worry about it. For all we know, no one really caught the Beavecoon at all, and it's just a hoax. Stranger things have happened by far," he said, trying to cheer her up.

Sam gave him a small smile. "That's not all I'm sad about, you know."

"Well then, what?"

Sam watched the castle lights draw nearer. "It's just, I'm kinda gonna miss this. The adventure and all? Don't get me wrong, I'm so grateful to be able to live in the castle as a princess, but it's not always all it's cracked up to be. I've enjoyed this freedom. The times when we weren't kidnapped, anyway."

Freddie chuckled. "It's true. Being kidnapped doesn't feel very free," he joked.

"Ah, you know what I mean." Sam swatted him playfully from her horse.

"We're here." Freddie could see peasants and castle guards running to meet them, ecstatic at finding the lost princess, no doubt.

"Princess Samantha! Hurry, you must come and meet up with your royal family now! They have been extremely worried about you!" yelped one of the guards, barely holding his helmet on his head as he ran to catch up to the horses.

"Yeah, yeah, tell them I'll be with them soon. I need to hear the winner of the contest, already!" said Sam, giving him a royal brushoff. "And don't call me Samantha!" She spurred Billy, and galloped through the square to the castle courtyard. Freddie spurred Gigabit as well, not wanting to get far behind. When they pulled the horses up to the gate, they could see that the courtyard was once again packed with contestants. Most of them looked very angry, but a few were actually crying. Probably from exhaustion.

"Hear ye, hear ye!" King Shay spoke his signature crowd calmer to get everyone's attention. "You are all gathered here to learn of the Beavecoon-capturing contest winner, correct?" he shouted. The crowd buzzed, in some areas with boos. "Then let the prince announce the winner!"

Prince Spencer stepped forward. "Ah, there's my quirky yet lovable big brother," Sam muttered to Freddie. "He's gotta be wetting his royal trousers from excitement right about now." Indeed, Spencer looked like he was about to start doing cartwheels on his platform.

"Ooookay, people! Gentlemen and any ladies out there and all your horses and stuff! We have an actual winner of this contest!" Spencer started bouncing on the balls of his feet. "He is feared by many. He is a formidable foe. He is my new best friend! Royal and loyal subjects, I give you your contest winner. He goes by the name of..."


	19. Preparations

**Disclaimer: _"The prefix 'dis' has several meanings, but its most basic meaning is 'not.'" "Claim: to take as the rightful owner." "Disclaimer: a denial or disavowal of legal claim." _You know what all that means? I don't own iCarly.**

Prince Spencer paused for dramatic effect. "...Sir Gibson!"

A tall young man, who had a brand-new shirt on backwards, stepped up on the platform next to the prince."That's right, people!" he shouted. "I, Sir Gibson, also known to my close friends as Gibby," he gave Spencer a wink, "have captured the mystical Beavecoon! As the winner, I now present the creature to our future king. Reuben?" At Gibby's signal, Reuben staggered his way through the crowd carrying a large cage.

"Sir Gibby!" said Spencer excitedly. "Tell the crowd how you did it! I'm sure they wanna know." The crowd buzzed in agreement.

"Well," said Gibby importantly. "It's kind of a long story. But I'll have you know, digging holes works much better than everyone thinks."

"Coool. Ah, can I touch it? Wait! No," said the prince. "Guards, take the Beavecoon to my royal bedchamber for the time being. Post someone to watch over it so that it is comfortable but doesn't escape."

"Yes, yer highness," said a guard gruffly. He and four other men took hold of the cage and carried it away.

"See you later, Coony," said Spencer softly, watching them go. He turned back to the crowd. "Now that the contest is over, let the festivities begin!" The crowd whooped with enthusiasm at the reminder of free food. "My family and I will join you shortly."

* * *

"So, how did you _really _capture the Beavecoon?" asked Princess Carly with wide eyes.

Sir Gibby swallowed and set his chicken leg down on his plate. He got a place of honor at the dinner table for being the contest winner. "Can you keep a secret?" he whispered. Carly nodded solemnly, and Gibby glanced around to make sure no one else was listening. "I barely caught it."

Carly gasped. "Does that mean you cheated? I can't keep that a secret! I'm the princess!"

"No, no!" said Gibby quickly. "See, I almost didn't sleep at all during the contest, and it was giving me all these crazy ideas. So I started digging all these holes everywhere with my partner Reuben. I guess I hoped a Beavecoon would fall in by chance or something. After a while, Reuben and I both fell asleep for an entire day, and when we woke up I couldn't believe how stupid we'd been! That is, until..."

"Until what?" asked Carly anxiously.

"Until I checked the holes, and there was actually a Beavecoon in one of them!" Gibby exclaimed.

Carly giggled. "That's some story you've got. At least I have you to entertain me while my sister is still missing," she sighed.

"Hey, it'll be okay," said Gibby gently. "Part of my duty in honoring my family is rescuing damsels in distress. I do comforting, too. I bet your sister will show up when you least expect her, completely fine and ready to give you a big apology."

"Thanks Gibby. If all of that comes true, maybe I'll start using you as my royal psychic." Carly stared at him for a moment. "...wait a minute. When you showed up, were you not wearing a shirt?"

"Well, no. I started the competition wearing a full suit of armor, and I didn't have an extra shirt to put on when I took that off. So I went shirtless. I like it better that way anyway, it's more natural and freeing, you know? The prince gave me this shirt when I told him I got the Beavecoon."

"It was fairly obvious to me that you don't like wearing shirts, by the fact that the one you have on is backwards," Carly grinned. "Just take it off, Sir Gibson. I'd like to get to know this natural and free side of you. Plus, you know how to distract a girl when she's feeling down."

Gibby grinned back at her. "I think I'd like to get to know you better too, Princess."

* * *

"Are you ready to return to your family now?" Freddie asked Sam. They'd stayed behind in the courtyard after the announcement of the winner.

"Yes. I do miss them, and I feel guilty that I caused them worry. It's time for me to go home." Sam looked sideways at Freddie. "You probably know I hate to say this, but... thanks. For keeping me in line, and watching out for me and all. I probably would have survived alone, but it wouldn't have been nearly as fun." An uncharacteristic blush bloomed on her cheeks. "It's been interesting."

"Will I see you again?" asked Freddie. "I mean, I was planning on sticking around for the coronation. I understand if you'd rather cut it off here, though."

"Nah, you should come," said Sam. "It would mean a lot to m- my brother. To have foreign royalty here. He'd like that."

Freddie smiled. "If it means that much to your brother."

* * *

A week had gone by, faster than anyone could have dreamed. The castle was full of the hustle and bustle of coronation preparation. Princess Sam had been welcomed back with more love than scolding; even Princess Carly had been too relieved to be angry for long. King Shay was happy to see his daughter safe, but he did notice she seemed different. He hoped it was a good thing. Prince Spencer, meanwhile, was still so keyed up over the capture of the Beavecoon and his upcoming crowning that he did hardly more than sweep Sam into a crushing hug before running off to spazz over something new.

Sam was now hiding behind a pillar in the courtyard in attempt to escape the royal stylists. They'd already combed and braided and pulled her hair until she couldn't take it anymore, and her dress was making it hard to breathe. It was a relief to get some fresh air and silently watch the entire castle get cleaned. _If they try to make it any shinier, everyone will be running into each other out of blindness _she thought. _I'm glad the ceremony is outside._

As time passed, a few guests began arriving, and Sam watched with mild interest. It appeared Spencer was friends with a bunch of weirdos... or maybe they were just peasants.

"Have you been hiding there all day?"

Sam whipped around to find a boy she barely recognized, as he was wearing clean clothes. "_Freddie?_ What do you think you're doing? This is _my _castle! You aren't allowed to sneak up on the princess." She tapped her chin thoughtfully. "I think I'll have you beheaded."

"And good afternoon to you, too, princess," said the young prince sarcastically. Then, in a more serious tone: "I missed you this week. Things weren't the same without you yelling at me every two seconds. Also, I'm surprised you let them torture your hair like that." Freddie gestured to her head. "I like it better all wild and curly. It better reflects your... unrestrained personality."

"Did you come here just to critique my hair? Now you're really gonna get it. Before I behead you, I'm going to subject you to Princess Carly's cooking!" Sam teased.

"Actually, I'm hardly even here for the crowning," said Freddie shyly. "I've had a lot to think about this week, and, frankly, you turned my entire world upside down. I don't know what to do about it, Sam. I only hope I've had as much of an impact on you."

"I don't know about impact so much as annoyance," said Sam nervously.

Freddie rolled his eyes. "I'm not a gambling man by nature. Yet somehow, you make me take risks with things as big as my life. So now, if I may, I'm going to risk the biggest thing of all: my heart." Freddie got down on one knee. "Princess Samantha. You drive me crazy in every meaning of the word, and I can't imagine being separated from you when I go back to Edmonston. I'm falling more in love with you each day. Would you do me the honor of becoming my queen, my wife, and my best friend?" He gazed hopefully, and somewhat fearfully at Sam as he waited for her response. Sadly, all he got was a thump on the head.

"I can't believe this, you chauvinist!" Sam exclaimed. "Get off the ground! I won't have a so-called man doing everything for me. I am a woman, and I am royalty. I will not be treated as though men can do all. Stand up."

Freddie did as she commanded, confusion on his face. "A simple no would have gotten the point across. I suppose I'll leave you then; goodbye, Sam." He turned to leave, but Sam stopped him.

"You aren't leaving until after this." Now Sam knelt down on her knee, a bit of a difficult feat in her billowy dress. "Prince Freddork, heir of Edmonsdumb. I told you I won't let men do everything for me, and that includes this. You may not propose to me. I, however, can certainly propose to you. Will you just marry me already? Queen doesn't sound too bad. I can live with you for that." Seeing the hurt on Freddie's face, she added, "And of course, it helps that I kind of think I love you. Maybe. Don't spread it around."

Freddie laughed. "Who could say no to that?" Taking Sam's hand, he pulled her up until they were face-to-face. "Consider this a yes," Freddie whispered, and placed a careful kiss on the princess's lips.


	20. Coronation

**Disclaimer: I'm going to get 3 hours of sleep tonight, and I don't own iCarly. WELL ISN'T LIFE JUST DANDY?**

"I could not be prouder of my son as I pass the throne of Seattelonia on to him, like generations of fathers have done before me. Spencer has the biggest heart of any man I know, and will rule with justice. Place your trust in him, Seattelonia. He will lead you to great things." King Shay turned to Prince Spencer, where he had taken his seat on the throne. "Prince Spencer, as king of Seattelonia, it is my duty and my right to pass the crown onto my eldest son at the time I deem appropriate. Do you promise to uphold the laws set in place by you forefathers, to rule fairly and kindly, to communicate peacefully, and to someday pass on the crown as I pass it now to you?"

Spencer gulped the lump in his throat. "King Shay, my father, I do promise these things."

The king removed the crown from his head and placed it on Spencer's. "Then by the power vested in me, I now declare you King of Seattelonia and all of its territories!"

Princess Carly and Princess Sam cheered along with the crowd, and Sam whistled as Lady Sasha brought Spencer his scepter. The new king rose, tears sparkling in his eyes. "My people," he began. "My father has been a great ruler of this country. As a sign of my continuing love and respect for him, I now present my father with the Beavecoon. He will take care of it as he has taken care of us all, and I would be honored to have him own it. Here you go, father." Spencer handed over the cage.

"Thank you, son," said the retired king. "I will love him as much as you do, for I know what this means to you."

"I've got a country to take care of, now," said Spencer with a grin. "Let the coronation feast begin!"

* * *

"Prince Spencer!" Socksley burst through the dining hall doors. "I have caught you a top ten wanted enemy of Seattelonia!"

"Actually, Socks, it's King Spencer now," he said, pointing to the crown on his head. "And what?"

"I can't believe I missed the coronation," said Socksley, distracted. "I've caught you Nevel of Rue, sire! He is in the castle dungeon even as we speak." Socksley leaned closer. "As to the mission you sent me out on, well, I believe I've found two suitable young men to-"

"Attention, everyone! May I have your attention please!" Socksley was cut off by Prince Freddie banging a spoon against his glass. Freddie gestured for Princess Sam to stand up next to him. "The princess and I have an announcement. Princess Sam has agreed-" Sam cleared her throat menacingly, and Freddie sighed. "I have agreed to marry Princess Sam. She will become the queen of Edmonston!" Everyone at the table cheered. "You are all invited to the wedding."

Socksley gaped. "Well, King Spencer. He was one of my choices! I didn't know he was a prince, though, but that's even better!"

Princess Carly and Sir Gibby stood up as well. "I have an announcement about Sir Gibson, too," declared Carly. "No, we're not getting married! However, I have decided to award Sir Gibson the title of Duke alongside his knighthood. A noble knight such as he deserves it!" A few cat-calls and whistles mixed in with the cheering this time, causing both Carly and Gibby to blush.

"He was my other choice," said Socksley, amazed.

Spencer chuckled. "I suppose the girls know how to choose alright for themselves after all. Thanks for keeping an eye out, though; now you've caught a real live villian!"

Over where Sam and Freddie were sitting, Freddie was getting chastised by his mother for not telling him he got engaged. "..and if I hadn't come here for the coronation, who _knows _when you would have told me! Was it an inconvenience to let me know, hmm? Oh, don't look so frightened," scoffed Queen Marissa. "After all, mothers who have married sons will never be the lonely ones! Be married soon and multiply. But hurry now, before I die!"

"Mother, you realize your rhymes are a bit scary," said Freddie cautiously.

"You remember them better that way," she replied.

"That's for sure. My brain will be forever scarred with that one," muttered Sam.

"Here's my raspberry soccer ball!" announced a voice behind them. Sam and Freddie turned.

"Hey, Reuben. You brought your... girlfriend?" asked Freddie. A girl with long blonde hair smiled dazzlingly at him from her position on Reuben's arm.

"That's me," the girl chirped. "Reuben has told me all about you two. No offense, Princess, but I don't think we look anything alike!"

"You got that right," said Sam in disgust.

"Well, I'm glad you've been reunited, with.. Melanie, is it?" asked Freddie. Melanie nodded.

"We're so happy to live in our little cottages in the woods. In fact," Melanie giggled, "we'll soon be in only one! We're getting married."

"Tying the knot," said Reuben happily.

"It's nice to see everyone has someone," said Freddie, shooting Sam a quick smile. She couldn't help but give him a tiny one back.

* * *

"So Nevel got sentenced to live with Nora and Mandy? And they aren't allowed to leave?" Carly asked, incredulous. The two princesses were packing Sam's belongings for her move to Edmonston. They were taking the time to catch up on everything they'd missed in each other's lives.

"Yeah, how's that for justice! King Spence is doing a great job so far," said Sam proudly. "Nevel can't stand Nora's constant talking, and Nora gets fed up with Nevel's snootiness. It's torture for them both."

"But wasn't Mandy kind of innocent? She fed you and helped you escape. Twice," Carly pointed out as she folded a nightgown.

"She's actually fine with it. She never gets to make many new friends, so to her, Nevel is her new best friend. She's the only one allowed to leave the house, but I guess she doesn't much since she's pretty young." Sam shrugged. "I told her she can come visit me and Freddie after we're married. We owe her more than I wish we did."

"That's really sweet, Sam," Carly beamed. "I'm really proud of who you've become."

"Aw, well... come here, you." Sam gave Carly a tight hug. "I'm always proud of you. You've got to stay here and make sure Spencer doesn't get power-crazy, okay? And that dad takes care of Coony like he said he would. I'll write to you, too."

"So you say," Carly laughed. "It doesn't matter. Either way, I'll be writing to you so much Seattelonia is going to run out of paper."

"You have Gibby to keep you company," Sam said slyly.

"Ooh! I'm going to get you for that one!" Carly dropped a laundry basket and lunged for her sister.

"Can't catch me!" Sam ran out the door. Both girls knew in their hearts that they would always be close even when far away from each other. It was a part of who they were. Sometimes, life tries to throw obstacles in your way, but as long as you have people who love you there by your side, you will always have a happy ending. Enjoy the journey.

And they all lived...


	21. Library Again

**Disclaimer: I didn't own this story when I started it a year ago, and I still don't own it now, at the end.**

* * *

"HAPPILY EVER AFTER!" shouted the library kids, earning Spencer a stern look from Marge at the front desk. He shrugged helplessly at her.

"Kids will be kids!" he called, then turned back to the children. "Nowww. Who liked that story, raise your hand!" All the kids' hands shot up, and Spencer leaned forward conspiratorially. "There's something secret about that story that you don't know. Maybe if you reeeeally wanted, I could tell-"

"DADDY!" A little boy with shaggy brown hair attacked Spencer's leg, cutting him off.

"Oh, hey, squirt!" said Spencer, ruffling the boy's hair. "How was your day at the zoo?"

"It was okay," said the boy thoughtfully. "Some things were really cool, like the elephants! But some things were boring. All Danni wanted to see was the baby penguins." He pouted.

"As long as you didn't give your aunt and uncle a hard time about it," said Spencer, giving his son a meaningful look.

"Um, helloooo?" Lulu butted in. "Mr. Spencer, what was the big secret you were telling us about the story? We wanna know! We wanna know _now_!"

"Hey Spence," greeted a dark-haired man as he walked in with his family. His wife had long blonde hair and was toting a dozing three-year-old girl on her back.

"Bennett, why would you run away from me when I've got Danni on my back?" the woman wheezed. "Your old uncle isn't fast enough to keep up with a kid like you."

"Hey, I resent that!" the man frowned. "You're the same age as me, anyway, which is still pretty young!"

"Mentally, maybe. Physically, you didn't make it far past age fourteen," the woman snickered.

"You don't seem to have a problem with me physically," her husband replied smugly.

"Oh, shut it, Benson."

"Why don't you shut it... _Benson." _

"I hate when you do that!" The woman stamped like a child, then steadied herself when she remembered she had an actual child on her back.

"Well, I _love _when I do that," said the apparent Mr. Benson.

"Hey, Sam, Freddie?" cut in Spencer. "I've kinda got to wrap up storytime here. So if you could maybe..."

"Oh, sorry! What story are you telling?" asked Freddie.

"Princess Sam and Prince Freddie," said Spencer with a smirk.

"Ah. My favorite one," said Freddie with a wink. "We'll wait in the cooking section until you're done. Come on, Bennett."

"You'd better be picking out a gourmet dinner recipe," grumbled Sam.

Spencer turned back to the crowd of children, whose eyes had all seemed to grow as large as their heads. "M-Mr. Spencer!" gasped Lulu. "Is that... _them? _Is that the real prince and princess? Mr. Spencer, you didn't tell us they had a _baby!" _

"Yeah, what up with that, man!" Noah exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air.

"Ditto what they said!" complained Nate.

Spencer motioned for them to quiet down. "Bup bup bup! Wasn't I just about to tell you a big secret about the story?"

"Yeeees," came the mumbled response.

"Well okay then. That's the secret. The story is real!" Spencer grinned at everyone.

"So wait," piped up a girl named Emmy. "Does that mean you're really a king? Why don't you have a big crown? Does that make Bennett a prince?" She eyed Bennett, who was tugging on Freddie's shirt to get his attention, with new interest.

"Whoa there!" said Spencer. "The only thing I'm king of is this library. And you'll do well to remember that." He waggled his eyebrows comically, gaining a few giggles from the kids. "What really matters is that it was a happy ending for everyone in real life, too, and it's been happy ever since."

"Are Carly and Gibby real too?" asked Nate.

"Yes, they are."

"Are they married?" asked Lulu, her eyes still wide from all the afternoon's information. Spencer shook his head violently. "Oh. Are they dating?"

"Yes, they are," Spencer stated with a bit of a grimace. "Thank god they're taking it slow, though. I think that's enough questions for today!"

Spencer wrapped up the reading program since it was running over time, promised another fantastic story for next week, and said his goodbyes.

"Thanks again for watching Bennett," he said gratefully as he walked over to the young couple in the cooking section. "I would have left him with Gibby, but... you know how Gibby is."

"It's no big deal," said Freddie with a smile. "Besides, he and Danielle get along great."

Sam snorted. "No they don't, you nub! He and _Danni_ fight all the time!"

Freddie smirked at her. "That's how I know they're getting along."

"Dad, is mom gonna be done her secret doctor's appointment yet?" asked Bennett.

"Aunt Carly should be back with your mom by the time we get home," Spencer told his son.

"You still haven't told him Sasha's expecting?" whispered Sam.

"Expecting what?" Bennett inquired loudly.

"Shhhh, your mom and I will tell you all about it later. For now, what do you think about taking Uncle Freddie, Aunt Sam, and Danni out for ice cream?"

"Iiiice cweam?" stirred the little brunette girl on Sam's back. Suddenly her head shot up and her blue eyes sparkled . "I want ice cweam!"

Everyone laughed. "Always mama's girl," said Sam fondly. "That's right kiddo. Maybe we'll get some bacon-flavored this time?"

"Ewwww." Danni crinkled her nose.

"She's also my girl," said Freddie, holding back another laugh.

Spencer couldn't help but grin at the little family before him. Perhaps next week it would be time to tell the kids a sequel to the story of "Princess Sam".

_**The End.**_

* * *

_(A/N: I can't believe it's over! I was such a terrible updater over the course of this story, so it feels like I've been working on it for a long time. I hope you've enjoyed it, though, and that the ending is everything you want it to be. Thank you to all my faithful readers and reviewers; you're half the reason I do what I do. Until next time! Keep the Seddie alive :)_


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